You live and learn
by ParisPearl
Summary: Emily is the new English teacher at Roundview college. When she meets Naomi she instantly feels herself drawn to the beautiful blonde, but can they overcome the obstacles and be together?
1. Chapter 1

I woke with a start and blinked my eyes a few times to adjust them to the bright light floating in my room where the curtains were slightly ajar. Slowly I turned my head to my clock, 6 am, I couldn't believe it, all I wanted was to get a decent night's sleep for once…my thoughts where interrupted by a loud banging on my door, which I recognized as the reason I woke up in the first place.

"Emily for fucks sake open the fucking door, I need to borrow this black top of yours!"

Katie. Ah I should have known, who else could it be? Groaning I made my way to the door of my room, just as I unlocked it (I locked it ever since I was a teenager and found out that my perverted little brother James nicked my underwear and did god knows what with it…YUCK…too early for such thoughts) it was swung open, a rather annoyed Katie storming past me.

"Well good morning to you too, Katie"

"Yeah whatever, so where is it?", she asked rummaging around in my closet.

"Where is what?", I asked slightly confused.

"The top, Ems! Do you ever listen to one single word I say?", she yelled even more annoyed than a few minutes before_. Ah yeah the top, totally forgot about that,_ I blamed my still fuzzy brain.

"Actually I wanted to wear it today, you know my fist day and all…", I explained.

"Well let's see, you don't need to look sexy when you're in work, so I definitely need it more!", Katie countered.

"Why are you up this early anyway?", I was rather shocked, usually you have to drag Katie out of bed unless it's already afternoon.

"I have a date!", she stated proudly a broad grin braking out and almost splitting her face in half, it looked pretty funny and I was trying to contain my laughter, so she wouldn't be even more pissed than she already was.

"At 6 am? What kind of freak is taking you out at 6 am?", wow she must be fairly desperate to agree to this.

"At least he's male and rather good looking, that's all that matters, right?"

By now my room was a mess, clothes scattered all over my floor and bed. I shook my head in disbelief, and who was gonna tidy this up again? Yea, me! Now Katie was not the only one, who was annoyed, great start in the day. Well it can only get better, right?

"Found it!", Katie exclaimed, disappearing quickly and several minutes after that I heard the front door slam shut behind her.

I sighed and started to put my clothes into their previous place again. I literally couldn't believe how ridiculously similar this exchange with my sister was to my first day at Roundview college, just a few years ago. And now it's my first day at Roundview again, only this time it's as a teacher. Putting my last garment back into the closet I smiled, yeah it simply has to be a good day, I had been looking forward to this since I decided I wanted to become a teacher four years ago. I glanced at my watch half past six, time for a shower.

An hour later I started the engine of my new moped, I really loved my old one, the one I had driven during my college time, but it looked rather rusty now and I wanted to make a good impression, so I decided to not take it. This new one was coloured in a dark red, it reminded me of my favourite wine and matched my hair perfectly, which was now a few shades darker than when I had been a teenager. _It was nice, actually_, I thought while enjoying the air stream through my hair.

I pulled to a halt in front of my old college and observed the scenario for a few minutes. The building looked still exactly the same, I smiled when I saw the huge banner above the entrance, _Welcome to Roundview, _it said. Yeah exactly the same. It was loud and cramped, people everywhere, shouting, laughing, telling each other stories about their holidays, listening to music….

Taking a deep breath to calm my nerves I made my way to the back door (I decided to not take the front door as I didn't want to push my way through the crowd). The back of the college was ridiculously calm in comparison to the front. I took in my surroundings and noticed a blond girl, sitting on the steps, smoking a fag. Except her I was the only one here. I studied her from the distance and decided that she must be part of the staff too, a teacher probably_. Calm down, Emily_, I reminded myself, _you're not sixteen anymore she won't bite you head off_. Although I wasn't as shy as back then I wasn't outgoing either. It was hard for me to make new friends or even acquaintances, but I wanted to change that and here was my opportunity to take the first step in the right direction. I walked towards her, sat down a step below her and smiled. She turned around to face me, her eyes narrowing in the process; slowly she raised an asking eyebrow at me. But all I could think was: _oh my good I've never seen such beautiful eyes in my whole life._ They were a clear ice blue with a slightly darker ring surrounding the iris. A cough reminded me that I was probably staring; I blinked a few times, lowered my head and blushed. _Well great Emily, the first colleague you meet and you already managed to make a fool of yourself._ A sudden movement brought me back to reality and I looked up to see, that she was silently offering me a cigarette. "Thanks", I mumbled and lightened one. I didn't usually smoke but right now it was all I needed to calm my nerves.

"You are new.", the blonde stated, not looking at me.

"Yeah", I choked out and cleared my throat when I noticed just how husky my voice sounded. Even huskier than normally.

"I'm Naomi", she spoke up again and I couldn't help to pick up how confident she sounded. _Naomi_, I thought, _pretty name, just like her. No_, Emily_ she is your co-worker, you can't think things like that, _I scolded myself.

"Emily", I said hesitating.

"Well, what are you doing here, Emily?", she asked and I frowned, surprised by the rudeness in her tone.

"I-I well I know I should probably have taken the front door but I don't like crowds and I –I just thought I could use the backdoor…", I trailed of, already embarrassed by my ramble.

"Students aren't allowed to take the backdoor.", she informed me and I couldn't contain my laughter. I knew I was short, but I wasn't aware of the fact that someone could mistake me as a 16-year-old college student.

Naomi looked at me, rather annoyed and stood up. "The bell's already rung about 5 minutes ago, so unless you want to be late on your first day I suggest you get going." And with that she turned around and left me standing there, dumbfounded.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sooo second chapter, I hope you like it and sorry for my bad English but my first language is actually German….I'm trying my best though ;)**

**Disclaimer: I neither own Skins nor the characters **

**Please let me know what you think So, enough rambling back to the story:**

I sat in a quite uncomfortable chair in Doug's office, he was the new headmaster and I was happy for him he really deserved it, he was a good man.

"Well Emily, make sure to not come late again, okay? Unfortunately you've already missed my speech, but that's not a big deal. Here is your timetable, your first class is on this floor….ah you already know your way around, don't you?, he smiled expectant at me.

"Yeah 'course, sorry for being late, it won't happen again.", I assured him and we said our goodbyes.

With a glance on my timetable I knew that I had form BD2 next. _Great, the 17-years-old_ I thought sarcastically. Don't get me wrong, I really liked children, sorry teenagers but I guess it would have been easier to have the younger ones on my first day. Sighing I opened the door to the classroom and was immediately greeted with a couple of very loud and impolite teens, they hadn't even noticed that I was already here. Standing at the front I cleared my throat as loud as I could.

"Woooow hey sexy, come sit with me!", a boy in the last row shouted.

I raised my eyebrows, "And you are?", I asked sternly. "I can be whoever you want me to, babe", he grinned slyly and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at me. I took a deep breath and decided to be strict; I had to be otherwise they would take control and I couldn't let that happen.

"Well I am sure that is not the way you are supposed to talk to a teacher and if you ever do it again we'll have a serious problem. Get it?", I said with my arms akimbo. Suddenly it was very quiet and twenty shocked eyes stared up at me.

"I am Emily Fitch your new English teacher and I'd like to be treated with respect, so I'll respect you too." I turned around and wrote my name on the board. Then the whole class erupted in laughter. _Shit, I knew I wouldn't be able to pull it off convincing and now my class is laughing at me. Great Miss Fitch! I should have become a fitness trainer just as dad wanted me to. _

"You're fucked Cook!", another boy with dark hair and a lazy smile laughed.

"Well, she's hot! How should I have known Freds?", the obnoxious boy in the last row shouted back. _Cook. _I checked the names on my list and found him.

"James Cook!", I said with a firm voice "I usually don't swear much but as I think that's the only language you understand, SHUT THE FUCK UP!" It was silent again and I released a breath I hadn't even realised I had been holding. This strong and confident exterior was just show, but nobody needed to know that right?

"Well let's start then, shall we? As I already introduced myself now it's your turn. I want you to stand up tell me your name and an interesting fact about yourself. Let's begin with you." I pointed at a small girl with brown hair in the front row. She blushed and stood up.

"M-my name is Molly a-and I love drawing." Molly sat down again. I smiled warmly at her, she reminded me of myself when I was her age. "Thanks Molly. Next one."

When it was Cook's turn he put his feet on the table and said: "I'm Cook and I've a very hot new English teacher." He bellowed with laughter and I suppressed my upcoming blush. _No weakness, _I reminded myself. So I rolled my eyes instead and started with actually teaching.

The cold evening air hit me when I stepped out of the school; I took a deep breath and put my gloves on. _First day: survived. _I smiled proudly, that was the hardest bit. On my way to the parking lot my phone rang and with a quick look on the caller I.D. I sighed and picked up.

"Hi Katie, how was your date?"

"Shit, but that's not important now, we're going out, so move your lazy arse and get ready!"

"I had an exhausting day Kay, I'm tired."

"It was your first day and we're gonna celebrate this, end of discussion. I'll text you the address, see you."

"But Katie-" But she had already hung up. Great, now I had to dress up for a night out with my sister when really I just wanted to spend a quiet night at home, reading a book or something.

Two hours later I stood at the bar of some dodgy club, Katie had already abandoned me for "some fit bloke". I had known it would end like this but as I was already there I decided I could also have a few drinks and "celebrate" on my own. Sipping on my Mojito I let my eyes wander: It was like all the other clubs I knew, many underage teenagers drinking, dancing and taking drugs. I shook my head but upon hearing the intro of one of my favourite songs I had the sudden urge to dance myself. So I took off and pushed my way through some sweaty people grinding against each other and started to slowly sway to the music. Surprisingly I enjoyed letting go and losing myself in the beat. After a few minutes two slender arms slung around my waist and just as I was about to push whoever it was away, that someone whispered in my ear: "Hey Emily". Despite the loud bass I registered the voice immediately, Naomi. I turned my head slightly to get a better look at her and smiled. "Hey yourself"

We danced for a while and I found myself really liking the feeling of her body pressed against mine. _Emily, she is your colleague, you shouldn't be doing this. _I shook my head in order to get rid of the annoyingly rational thoughts; I was just having fun, right?

"Drink?", she asked and I nodded, I could really do with some cooling off. Naomi grabbed my hand and dragged me to the bar. "What do you want?", she slurred slightly. _She's drunk, that's why she's suddenly so outspoken._

"Vodka lemon", I answered and she ordered 2.

We found a booth in a rather quiet corner, well as quiet as it could be, and sat down.

"Already enjoying Bristol's nightlife I see?" our eyes locked over the table and I felt my breath hitch. I couldn't help myself thinking: _She is so beautiful, even if she's drunk. _

"Well not by choice. That's not really my scene but my sister dragged me here so…", I trailed off, but kept looking in her eyes. She nodded and chewed on her bottom lip as if she was contemplating something. It looked unbelievingly cute and I had to avert my gaze, so she wouldn't see me blush. _Fucking inappropriate thoughts._

Naomi didn't notice, what I was really thankful for, and took a deep breath before saying: "You wanna get out of here?"

_YES,YES, YES! I'd go anywhere with you! _My brain practically shouted at me but I hesitated. _Why was she even behaving like this, I mean she thought I was a student she shouldn't be asking a student this, should she?_

I found myself nodding though, Naomi grinned and took my hand once again. Oh my good it felt so good to have her hand in mine. She had long, slender fingers, which were really soft and…_aaah stop it Emily!_

__

I was currently sitting on a swing in a quite dark park, just a few streets away from my flat, and freezing my ass off. But you know what, that didn't really matter because Naomi sat on the swing next to me and was giggling about some silly joke I had made. I didn't know if it was only the alcohol that made her this…mmh free was the best term for it I guess, but I liked this version of her without a doubt better than the rude, snappy Naomi I had met this morning.

"I think I like you Emily", she said out of the blue and it made my heart skip a beat.

"I think I like you too Naomi", I responded smiling. _What? I did, get over it!_

Taking my hand Naomi stood up and brought me with her, we were only inches apart now and I looked straight into her unbelievingly blue eyes. Slowly she tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear and let her hand linger on my cheek. My face tingled where she was touching me and I never wanted it to stop. I closed my eyes and leaned into her hand, hoping she would get the hint and kiss me already.

I wasn't usually this confident, I never ever had the guts to make the first move but with Naomi it was different, I wanted to kiss her so badly I simply couldn't wait any longer.

So I leaned in and my heart beat so fast I was sure she could hear it, but there was no room in my brain to feel embarrassed, all I could feel was nervous anticipation. _What will her lips feel like on mine? Is she a good kisser? Are her lips as soft as her hands? _

Just as I was about to find the answers to all these questions a loud ringing ruined the moment and we practically flew apart. For the second time today I cursed my mobile.

"Hello?" I picked up without actually looking who it was that was calling but it didn't matter, whoever it was I was definitely gonna kill them.

"Emsy, where are you? Are you okay?", it was Katie's concerned voice and most of my anger dissipated. I had forgotten to tell her that I had left.

"Hey Katie, yes I'm fine don't worry, just had to get out there"

"Emsy I don't feel very well I think I'm gonna throw up"

_Oh fucking hell, perfect timing for my sister's party escapades, my anger started to rise again. She was 24 for fuck's sake she should be able to look after herself!_

"Where are you Katie? I'm gonna pick you up, okay?" But I couldn't leave her hanging; she was my sister after all.

Naomi, who was standing a metre away, frowned and quirked an eyebrow. _Oooooh she is concerned, cute._

I shook my head at her and smiled to let her know everything was okay. Katie gave me the address of some bloke's house where I should pick her up und hung up. I sighed and turned to Naomi.

"Look, I'm really sorry but that was my sister she had probably too much to drink and I have to bring her home." She nodded slowly "Oh, I see".

"I had a great time though. I'm glad I met you." I smiled at her and hoped she'd believe me.

"Yeah, me too. Give me your phone?" She smiled back, oh thank fuck she wasn't mad at me. I handed her my mobile and she gave me her number. _I have her number, I have her number. I, Emily Fitch am getting the number of a gorgeous blonde._ A goofy grin spread across my face and I was once again glad nobody could read my mind. She called herself so she hand mine too and smirked satisfied.

"I'll call you Em" A million butterflies erupted in my stomach upon hearing her little nickname for me. She had used it all evening and I wondered if she knew what effect it had on me. _Hopefully not, that would be awkward._

"Yeah, bye Naoms" I said as I turned away. Now I had to find Katie…so I could rip her head off for ruining my chance of the perfect kiss with the perfect girl.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi, regarding to your questions about the age of consent I have to admit that I just assumed it would be 18 in England too…I'm really sorry for my lack of research and promise do it properly next time I've already changed it, so I hope I got it right this time…**

**Chapter 3:**

**Hey Em, are you home and save? How's your sister? Xx N**

_Oh my god could she be any cuter? _Well, that was a rhetorical question, no she clearly couldn't. I smiled, the biggest fucking smile I had, I didn't expect to hear from her so soon. Quickly I opened a new text massage and typed:

**Hi Naoms, yeah already home, bit tired tough. Katie's fine she just passed out on my bed ;)**

**What about you? XX E**

**I** sighed and pulled MY duvet over Katie, in MY bed. But really I was just glad she was okay, when I had finally found her she had been lying on the street in her own vomit. _Yes, gross I know but she's just like that, ever was. _

I opened the door to her room and made myself comfortable in her bed, nuzzling in the many pillows. My phone still in hand I waited for Naomi's reply.

*beep,beep*

_Ah, here it is._

**You should go to sleep then I'm fine, don't worry**

**Good night, Em XX N**

**Good night Naoms, sweet dreams XX E**

And for the first time since I didn't know how long (but if I didn't know it had to be pretty long) I fell asleep with a smile on my face.

Second day at work and my mood was definitely better than yesterday, which was due to a certain blonde I hoped to see. Grinning like an idiot I stopped in front of my first class, it wasn't one of those I already knew so I had to look strict. I straightened up a bit and tried to not to grin like a lunatic.

Entering the room I looked at my new students, they seemed to be very quiet in comparison with my other classes but who knew.

"My name is Emily Fitch and I'm your new English teacher. I'd like you to stand up and introduce you to me so I know your names and a special fact about you. Beginning at the back please."

I smiled warmly and waited for my first pupil to speak up, as no one said anything and it remained silent I rose my gaze from the papers I was looking at to the last row and my breath literally caught in my throat as familiar ice blue eyes stared surprised back at me. _Naomi, oh fuck._

A few minutes passed and we were still starring at each other, I couldn't believe it Naomi a student. I nearly kissed my student yesterday. I. kissed. a student. _FUCK!_

The others totally oblivious to what was happening began to chat noisily and this snapped my mind back to reality. I cleared my throat and breathed slowly in and out. I never thought I'd be glad for Katie's bad timing in the end.

"Would you please start", I addressed Naomi trying to keep my voice neutral. She stood up, gazing at her hands she said "I'm Naomi and yesterday was one of the best evenings of my life". When she said this she looked me directly in the eyes and I couldn't help but blush furiously. _FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!_ I don't believe there were any other words to describe this fucked up (yeah I use it again) situation. Desperately trying not to look at her I call "Next"

The rest of the hour went by in a blur and to be honest I couldn't concentrate at all, because my gaze seemed to wander of its own accord to the back only to find beautifully blue eyes already on me. When the bell finally rang I think I've never been so released in my entire life. I quickly gathered my things and was just about to leave the classroom when cold, slender fingers wrapped around my wrist and held me back. _FUCK again. _I slowly turned around and came face to face with Naomi.

"Do you need anything Naomi? I'm really sorry but actually I'm in a rush so if it's not that important it would be great if you could wait until our next lesson." Yeah I know this was weak, but I really had no clue how to handle this so I opted for the simplest possibility. "Actually it is quite important." She said with a calm voice. _How could she be so bloody fucking calm? _You remember when I said I don't usually swear that often? –Yep, it was a lie, obviously.

"What is it then?", I asked but only because I had to, really I just wanted to turn around and run until I couldn't see this bloody college anymore.

"Are you really going to act like we don't know each other, Em?"_ AAAH stop calling me that it makes my knees weak and my stomach flip and other things I definitely shouldn't be feeling about a student._

"Miss Fitch, please Naomi. It's quite inappropriate for us to be on first name terms.", I answered harsher than I had intended, but what was I supposed to do?

She seemed taken aback by my reaction and let go of my wrist. I sighed and turned around, but I swear I could hear her mutter "Please don't do this" and it broke my heart a bit. I truly liked her and if I was being honest I had hoped that we could become a bit more than only friends. _Well, that hope died over an hour ago, didn't it?_ _Why does everything have to be so complicated when it could be so easy? I meet a nice girl we get talking; exchange numbers, go on several dates, fall in love with each other and live happily ever after – see easy. _Obviously things like that only happen in fairy tales and although I felt like I was in the wrong movie (a really, really bad comedy) this was actually happening. I still couldn't believe it. I needed a break and I needed to talk to Effy. If somebody knew how to act right now, then it was her. She simply knew everything and for once I found myself not annoyed with this special gift of my best friend.

I slowly exhaled the smoke of my second cigarette in two days, this job clearly wasn't good for me. I took my phone out and pressed 1, speed dial for Effy's number.

"Hey Ems, what's up? Already boring at your new job?"

I simply had to laugh at this. _Oh Eff seems like you aren't all-knowing in the end._

"I wish it was Eff, something really, really bad happened"

"You slept with one of your students?"

Perhaps she knew a little more than she let on.

"No, no 'course not, but something like that"

"Oh I knew it naughty, naughty Miss Fitch!" she said chuckling.

"That's not funny Eff I am in trouble here okay?"

"Okay, okay sorry but you have to admit it's rather amusing"

"No it's not but shut up and listen now. You remember the blonde girl I told you about?"

"Naomi, right? You really liked that one."

"Yes Naomi and yes I really liked her but and here's the problem she is one of my students, EFF! Do you understand I'm supposed to teach her!"

"Well I can imagine some things you could teach her like when…."

"EFFY! I SAID NOT FUNNY!"

"Okay sorry. Well, yeah that's a problem, obviously."

"Yeah, obviously. And what am I supposed to do now?"

"Do you like her?"

"Of course I do, but that's not the point…"

"Just answer the questions, Ems. So do you get butterflies when your eyes lock?

"Yes", I mutter timidly.

"Would you like to spend more time with her- get to know her properly?"

"Yes", I answered so quiet I wasn't sure if she would catch it.

"When you came home yesterday did you feel like you could be more than friends with her?"

"Yes" again.

"Well, here you have your answer Ems"

"But Effy I can't I mean it's illegal to begin with, I'm her teacher…"

"Woah Ems, now you're exaggerating a bit, she's at least 16, so it's not illegal if you fall for her"

"I'm not falling for her!" I protested.

"Oh you so are, Ems. Just think about it."

And with this the line was dead, another thing I hated about her, she just said something cryptic, wants me to "think about it", and then she hung up without another word.

Infuriated I stubbed my fag out and kicked a tree. "FUCK!", I yelled.

"I'm sure it's not the tree's fault, whatever it is you are so angry about."

_Oh fucking hell, it's just getting better and better._

"Whatever it is I'm angry about- are you fucking serious Naomi?" I shouted at her.

"Jesus calm down, Em I know the situation isn't ideal, but let's just make the best of it." She smiled at me, how could she smile? I couldn't believe it. This was fucking serious!

"Isn't ideal? You are my fucking student, Naomi! Haven't you realised that?" I freaked out even more. "I almost kissed one of my students yesterday", in a lower voice, I didn't want anybody to find out about it, that would be the overkill.

"You wanted to kiss me?" she asked, eyes circling wide, surprise evident in her tone.

Hadn't she noticed the moment between us just before Katie had called? _Oh my god now I'm imagining things. I belong on a funny farm._

"It doesn't matter now, Naomi. The only thing that matters is that you're my pupil and I'm your teacher and we should behave like …"

Warm soft lips on mine, one hand on my hip the other playing with the hair on the nape of my neck, a slight vanilla scent in the air. I gasped and felt her smile into the kiss. _Oh my good, it feels even better than I thought it would. _I couldn't stop myself from cupping her cheek gently with one hand and resting the other one on the small of her back pulling her even closer. I knew I shouldn't be doing this but any rational thought was gone as soon as her lips connected with mine. I was on fire, my whole body was burning.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Thanks for reviewing and snaps for those of you who worked out that Naomi was a student on their own ;) Not really happy with this one but I hope you like it nonetheless. **_

**Chapter 4:**

The bell rang out loudly and this finally brought me back to my senses. _What am I doing here? I have to end this. NOW._

I forcefully opened my eyes and pushed her away, "I'm sorry that…that shouldn't have happened." I stuttered. "It's okay, Em" Naomi smiled warmly at me and I couldn't stop myself from thinking how beautiful she looked, her peroxide blonde hair swaying in the wind, her deep blue eyes sparkling and her smile…her wonderful smile. _NO EMILY, snap out of it!_

"I-I I have to go" and with this I turned around and almost ran back into the building and away from the most beautiful girl I had ever laid eyes on, the girl I had just kissed, the girl who was my student.

Spotting the staff bathroom I immediately made a beeline for it and locked the door behind me. Panting I leaned my back against it to bury my face in my hands. _Shit. I've truly and properly fucked up this time._

How could I let something like that happen? And the best part of it: Just outside the school? _Where I first met her, sitting on these steps and smoking. Ah shut up! Anybody could have seen us! Oh my god I hope nobody saw!_

**XXX**

**Meet me for coffee? We need to talk. XX N**

I just spent the last 10 minutes starring at the screen of my phone, contemplating whether or not I should go and see Naomi. I mean I wanted to, I really did, couldn't wait to see her again in fact, but I shouldn't – I couldn't. My thump hovered over the delete button, but I couldn't bring myself to do it so I typed a short reply:

**In 15 minutes. The small coffee shop opposite the park. E**

Promptly I pressed send, so I wasn't able to change my decision again. _We're just going to talk things over and then everything will be a lot easier._ Of course that wasn't what I really believed, I was just trying to calm down a bit and justify my actions. We had to meet at some point; just in order to sort everything out obviously. I grabbed my coat and stepped outside, the park was a good 15 minutes' walk away from my flat, but I didn't want to meet up with her somewhere that close to my apartment, so I wouldn't be tempted to invite her over.

I stood in front of the shop sneaking glances inside, trying to find my gorgeous blonde. _Woooah, my gorgeous blonde? Where did that come from?_ As on clue I spotted her sitting on a table in the right corner, facing away from me. _Come on Emily, just walk inside, tell her that none of this should've happened and that from now on you're only gonna be her teacher and nothing more._ I closed my eyes for a second and breathed slowly in and out. _I'm ready._

"Naomi", I mumbled. She stood up and beamed at me. "You came!" She was just too sweet. I immediately softened and smiled a bit. "Of course I came; it was me who told you to come here in the first place" She smiled even wider at this and I wondered if it hurt her already, it looked like she was just about to get a cramp form it.

"Sit down, Em. What do you wanna drink?" The situation reminded me painfully of the rather similar one in the club yesterday. I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment to clear my head and answered: "Latte macchiato, please." "Good choice, I think I like your taste", she smirked and winked at me. I had to stop this; I was only here to tell her that we couldn't see each other again and not to flirt with her.

"Listen Naomi, I just wanted to tell you that we shouldn't see each other anymore outside of college. And please stop texting me." Her face fell instantly and she furrowed her brows.

"What do you mean we shouldn't see each other anymore? I thought you liked me?"

"And I do Naomi I really do. You're a nice girl, but that's the point. You're what 16?"

"17 but my age has nothing to do with this!", she stated firmly. I let out a throaty but sad laugh.

"Your age has everything to do with this, but not only this you're my student Naomi, I'm supposed to protect you not seduce you!", I countered exasperated. _Why couldn't she understand?_

"That doesn't change anything Em. You could just get to know me and then decide what you want us to be", she looked at me with her bright blue orbs and I saw something resembling hope in them. No, there was no hope and I needed to make that clear.

"Don't you understand Naomi? It's not my decision to make, it's just impossible for us to be more than teacher and student!"

"Okay then let's just be friends. There's nothing _impossible_ about that, is there?"

"No, I suppose not", I said considerate. She was right, we could be friends. Why not? _Just friends, yeah that's it._ I felt my muscles relax, released a breath I didn't realise I was holding and unclenched my fists underneath the table. It would be difficult to remain objective in class but it seemed to be the best solution.

"But isn't it unbelievably uncool to be friends with a teacher?", I smirked cheekily at her and the tension immediately dissipated.

"Well, I think you're very cool Emily and to be honest every boy in this fucking college has his eye on you and I bet some of the girls too. So I'd be more than supercool with you as my friend. And if anybody has a problem with it they can go to fuck" Now she was smirking and I felt my cheeks burn under the gaze of her intense blue orbs.

"So how old are you? I mean you're acting like you are a fucking fossil in comparison with me." "Well, I kind of am Naomi", I admitted shyly.

"Nah you can't be much older than me. I mean I mistook you for a student when we first met." I giggled, but Naomi kept looking expectant at me.

Oh how sweet of her, but compared with her I really was rather old. "I'm 24 Naomi, nearly 25 to be perfectly honest." "That's what; 7 years oh come on Em that's nothing. We're in 21st century. My mum was once with a guy, who was like twice as old as she." I had a feeling that this was heading in the wrong direction again. "Yeah for **friends** it's perfectly okay to be not the same age.", I said, deliberately emphasising "friends". Her eyes hardened for a short moment and I wasn't sure if I was supposed to see that. "Yeah friends.", she muttered disapprovingly. I ignored it and tried to lighten the mood: "So you live with your mum then? Just the two of you?" She chuckled and I didn't quite understand what was so funny about that assumption. "Yeah thank fuck she finally kicked out all those losers!" I looked questioningly at her and waited for an explanation. "You must know until a few weeks ago we had like I don't know 16 other people living with us and none of them were paying rent." She must have picked up on my horrified expression because she went on: "My mum's kind of a hippie, trying to save the world and shit, so she took everyone home, who had nowhere to go. Once I woke up with a stranger in my bed, who definitely wasn't there when I went to sleep." In my head I saw a picture of a slightly younger Naomi freaking out upon realising she had an unexpected lodger. I burst out laughing and she slapped my arm playfully. "Hey that's not funny! He nearly gave me a heart attack! I sleep naked." My laughter died in my throat as I had automatically another image in my head in which Naomi had unmistakably less clothes on. The blonde noticed the change in my demeanour immediately and eyed me suspiciously. I shook my head to get rid of that thought. _Stop thinking like that! Friends Emily, friends. _

"Your mum sounds nice." I said to distract myself. "She's okay, though she can be quite irritating sometimes" she informed me with an eyeroll.

Our coffees were long finished, but I didn't want to go home just yet.

"Wanna take a walk?" I suggested.

"Sure, let's go"

**XXX**

It was really fucking cold outside; I had obviously underestimated "chilly" October nights. I tried hard to ignore the freezing wind ripping right through my bones and listen to what Naomi was telling me. Pressing my lips into a thin line I rubbed my hands together. That was all I could do to prevent myself from shivering.

"Are you cold?" Naomi interrupted her own story. I smiled at her thoughtfulness "Slightly". She stepped closer and began to rub her hands up and down my arms. This little contact made me shiver all the more when I felt the way my body was reacting to it: My heart rate sped up and my arms were covered in goose bumps where she had touched me. _Oh my god, get a grip Emily. You're acting like you were the 17-year-old. _

"Thanks" I took a step back in order to bring some distance between us. I simply couldn't take this proximity. "No problem. Maybe we should get you home; it's already relatively late anyway." I laughed at the ridiculousness of the situation. "I'm a grown-up Naoms, I can look after myself.", I said and nudged her shoulder affectionately. "I know I just don't want you to catch something." She smiled her trademark smile, the one that made my stomach flutter and my heart swell a little bit.

"I won't, don't worry. I've a very good immune system thanks to the vegetable shit my mum keeps feeding us and my dad's fitness training." I winked at her and began to walk again.

"Yeah you're definitely very fit." She replied smirking.

"Cheeky!" I called out. "Yeah well you seem to inspire it in me." We both started to chuckle and I had to admit that spending time with her was nice. It felt like we knew each other for ages, there were no awkward silences and stuff. Of course there was an underlying tension between us, I couldn't deny that even if I wanted to but it wasn't an unpleasant one.

"Well that's me." Naomi sated and stopped in front a cosy looking yellow house. _Oh what a cliché._ _Now only the kiss goodnight is missing. No Emily, there won't be any kissing. STUDENT remember?_

"Oh, okay bye Naomi. See you tomorrow."

"Bye Em." She answered and suddenly I was enveloped in a tight hug. I allowed myself to briefly enjoy the feeling of her in my arms, closed my eyes and inhaled her vanilla scent, while she seemed to do the same. _What? Friends hug all the time._

She released me shortly after and I already missed the warmth of her body, but I couldn't allow myself to dwell on it. With a last smile in my direction Naomi turned around and walked into her house.


	5. Chapter 5

**So this is the outcome of me trying to study Latin for my test tomorrow :D Hope you enjoy it ;)**

**Chapter 5: Naomi's POV**

"She looks nice. Why didn't you invite her in?" I should have known it, of course my mum had seen me with Emily, she always did that when I was out and she didn't know with whom: Waiting behind the curtains, sipping on her herbal tea, eager to find out about my "mysterious date". Although most of the time it wasn't even a date, and I just wanted some alone time or met up with Cook. Okay who am I trying to fool here, it was never a date. (and when I say never I really mean it, NEVER_). Maybe that's the reason why she's prying in the first place, maybe she thinks there's something wrong with me. Who wouldn't?_

I was 17 and never ever had a real date. Yeah I had kissed some people, I also had had a few pretty hot make-out sessions, but only if I had been drunk enough and always with random people. There had never been any sort of feeling involved and I wouldn't want it any other way: keep it simple, don't make any commitments and whatever happens don't attach yourself to anybody, because in the end the only person you can really rely on is yourself.

"Naomi love? Helloooo?" A hand waving in front of my eyes brought me back to reality. _Right, my mum._

"So who is she?" "None of your business mum.", I responded annoyed rolling my eyes at her, and walked into my room. My room, this was my sanctuary, no one was allowed in here without my permission, it was simply my territory. That's the reason why I freaked out when I had found out that my mum had finally accommodated somebody in here. This was just mine, the only thing I had ever had just to myself. And to be honest it had become a piece of me during the years, with my political posters and quotes (either of famous people or just some random statement I liked) all over the yellow walls, my comfy little sofa which was here ever since I could remember and books, endless shelves with books stuffed in them. Reading, that was another important constant in my life. When I read I felt completely at ease and found my peace between the lines of "Animal Farm", "The wave" or "Pride and Prejudice". If I was upset I read, if I was angry I read, if I was sad I read, it just helped me to forget about my life and the problems within it and took me to an alternative universe where I chased after the white rabbit together with Alice or fought against the "Dark Lord" alongside Harry Potter. So when I was sat in my bed, hovering above one of my favourite books I felt finally at home.

And that's what I desperately tried now. I had to escape reality once again looking for the answers in my books. Only this time it didn't work, which unsettled me a bit. It had always worked until now, while reading I could forget everything around me and just clear my mind. Not so today, the harder I attempted to concentrate on the black printed words covering the pages, the more I was lost in my thoughts. Thoughts about red and brown, soft skin and a subtle strawberry smell – thoughts about Emily.

**XXX**

The next few weeks went by without any important incidents, Emily and I had become really good friends, just as she wanted us to be. We seemed to have developed a routine: Every day the one who arrived at college first would wait for the other one at the back entrance. We would smoke and chat until the bell rang; it was just so easy to be around her I never had to pretend to be somebody I wasn't because she simply liked me for who I was. This was an entirely new experience for me, I was used to people ignoring me or treating me like shit, but with her it was just different. She wouldn't put up with my shit and just told me when I was being a bitch, another thing I liked about her; we were equal. Of course there had been a few awkward moments as well, when we got lost in each other's eyes and simply stared for a few minutes, when touches lingered longer than they should, when we came too close, but Emily would always end them before there could be more than that. At first I was disappointed, I thought if we spent some time together, got to know each other better, she'd come to the conclusion that she had made the wrong decision and tell me that in fact she wanted us to be more than friends. Guess I was wrong…but it was still worth it, she was worth it and I wouldn't even dream of giving up. I had looked for someone like her for so long, someone who understood me and was able to break through my walls. Now I had found her I wouldn't let her go easily; I just had to keep trying, sooner or later she'd give in. Or so I hoped.

It was Friday evening and I was getting ready for my _date_ with Em (I could still dream, couldn't I?). When she had told me that she'd never seen _The Notebook_ I had invited her to my place to watch it and get some take-out. I didn't usually like romantic movies, but I just adored this one it was so engrossing and sad, I couldn't believe she'd never watched it as romance was her favourite genre.

There was a knock on the door and I nearly sprinted down the stairs, I couldn't wait to see her again, although it wasn't even 7 hours ago I had last spoken to her. Ridiculous, I know, but I simply couldn't help myself when it came to Emily. I stopped just in front of the door and took a deep breath calming down a bit; she didn't have to know how eager I was to look at her incredibly beautiful face again. With a smile on my lips I let her in and mumbled a shy "Hey Em." _Yeah, I can be shy too, only around Emily of course, no one else is supposed to see that side of me. It's just for her._

"Hi Naoms, sorry I'm late Katie wouldn't shut up about that guy she's dating at the moment and refused to give me the key unless I listened." She sounded rather annoyed, but I thought she was cute, all flushed and out of breath. _Maybe she ran too? _My smile widened and I looked closely at her to take in her appearance: She wore dark blue skinny jeans with a tight green top and grey Converse. _Aaah green fits her perfectly; it just goes really well with her dark red hair, which reminds me of cherries. _She coughed and my gaze snapped to her face again, fuck I had been starring once again. I blushed furiously (yes, she could make me, Naomi Ice queen Campbell blush) and averted my eyes. "Stop perving and bring me my food girl, I'm starving!", Emily just smirked at me and for a short moment I saw a glint in her eyes, but it was gone before I could put my finger on it. "I wasn't perving! I just…just admired your shoes, yes your shoes. They look very…ahm…comfortable." _Smooth Naomi, really smooth. _I wanted to smack my head against the door frame I was leaning on. "My shoes, eh?", Emily winked at me and walked into the direction of my kitchen. Getting along with her so well had also its downsides, now the shy Emily was gone and in her place was cheeky Emily, whose first priority seemed to be to embarrass me as much as she possibly could. _Mission accomplished then._

**XXX**

We were now sitting on the sofa, watching the last minutes of the movie, well she was I had been too preoccupied with looking at her. She really was amazingly beautiful with the subtle light, coming from the TV, bouncing of her red hair and illuminating her soft features. I could spend my whole day just watching her expression change without getting bored of it. Every time I did I noticed something I hadn't before, like how she was adoringly biting her bottom lip during an emotionally scene or how a smile tucked on her mouth when she especially liked something. Now she pressed her lips into a thin line and gulped audible. _Oh, that's new, what is she thinking? _I looked at her curiously and realised that her eyes were glistening slightly with unshed tears_. Oh my god, is she crying? No, she couldn't be. Have I done something to upset her? _Slowly I reached out my hand and cupped her cheek until she turned to face me. As soon as my skin connected with hers a lonely tear rolled down and I immediately brushed it away with my thumb. "Hey Em, what's wrong?", I asked in a low, worried voice. She sniffed and bent her head down. "It's just…it's so…sad. He loved her so much that he stuck with her, trying to make her fall for him anew each single day, over and over again, just so he could be with her. I wish…I wish I had someone like that, someone who was in love with me so deeply to tell me our story consistently just so I could remember…" New tears escaped and I wiped them away just like the first one, it hurt to see her like that, so fragile and small. "I would", I mumbled before I could stop myself. _Shit, I hope she didn't hear it._ "What?" our eyes met, confusion evident in hers. _Fuck, no luck there._ "Nothing, I just…I ahm…" _Oh fuck it, just get it over and done with. _"I would. Stay with you I mean, I'd never give up and even if it was just for one day you'd remember, it would be worth it, you would be worth it." I looked down at my hands now resting in my lap, nervously fidgeting with the hem of my shirt. Suddenly I felt her fingers carefully pulling up my chin to meet her brown pools of chocolate again. I was overwhelmed by what I saw in them, warmth, surprise, adoration and…love? Could it be love? I didn't have enough time to think about it as she closed her eyes and leaned in slowly, pressing a soft kiss to my lips. I felt like all the air was pressed out of my lungs, my hands were trembling slightly and I couldn't help but kiss her again, longer this time. She instantly rapped her arms around my neck while mine settled on her waist stroking her sides. Our mouths fitted perfectly together, moving in sync. My tongue darted out and I licked her bottom lip asking for access, which she granted with a quiet whimper. That spurred me on even more and when the tips of our tongues met I couldn't supress a moan. This was all I had wished for since our last brief kiss a few weeks ago. I felt like I was flying or falling I really didn't know, but I hoped Emily would be there to catch me. After a couple of minutes we both broke away in need for air, but we stayed in our embrace resting our foreheads together. Eyes locked she started tracing patterns across the sensitive skin of my neck, which made me shiver slightly, earning a self-satisfied grin from her. "Wow-that was-just wow", I was at a loss for words. Amazing, unbelievable, earthshattering…nothing seemed to be enough to describe my feelings."I know", she simply confirmed and buried her head in my chest. I couldn't believe it, I was about to burst from happiness, I held the most beautiful, caring, intelligent woman I had ever met in my arms. Life simply couldn't get any better.

**XXX**

I was woken up by a pain flashing through my right arm, remembering the amazing redhead currently sleeping on it I tried desperately not to cry out. There was no way I'd disturb sleeping beauty in her peaceful slumber just because my fucking arm felt numb. I had to cherish every moment with her. Who knew how she'd react when she finally realised what had happened, I couldn't count out that she'd run again. _Stop thinking too much, just appreciate what you get! _I smiled down at her, using my other hand to gently stroke her hair out of her face. It was so incredibly soft I couldn't get enough of it; of her to be honest. My sore arm long forgotten, half an hour passed and I had just watched her sleeping. _Yeah I am aware of me being a creep, but I don't care. _I never got to see her like this, so vulnerable, so carefree I just had to enjoy it. When my eyelids were heavy again I turned my head to look at the time, 2 am I could do with a little more sleep myself, so I just nuzzled closer to Emily and drifted off; still smiling.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey, Thanks for all your lovely reviews I really appreciate them (especially to **_**fookyeahskins**_**, who has reviewed every single chapter, you're great!)**

_**smcl**_** – Thanks a lot, Latin was a bit shit though….but fuck it :D You speak German?**

**To the chapter, it's a bit shorter than usually, but I hope you forgive me. I promise to update soon though, 'cause I'm ill and let's be honest there's not much else to do ;)**

**I hope you like it and please let me know what you think. Best part/ worst part whatever **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Skins**

**Chapter 6: Naomi's POV**

"NAOMI! Hey wake up love, it's already 3 pm" My eyes shot open but I had to squint because of the bright sunlight shining through the windows. The first thing I noticed was the space, too much space, there was nobody's weight pressing down on me; there was no Emily.

"Where's Emily?" I blurted out. "Emily? Who is Emily?" _Oh shit, why couldn't I just keep my mouth shut? _Of course she wasn't here anymore, I knew she wouldn't but I supposed there had been still a little hope left. How stupid of me to believe last night had changed anything, she still didn't want me and maybe never will.

"What's going on love? Talk to me I know that there's something bothering you." my mum smiled reassuringly at me. Perhaps I should just tell her, she knew how to handle rejection after my prick of a father left. She sure as hell could give me some good advice_. Just do it, maybe all those people who say talking helps are right in the end? I suppose I just have to try. _

With a deep intake of breath I steeled myself and spoke up: "Mum there is somebody I really like…" "Ah I get it. Emily, isn't it? So where's the problem? I'm sure she's a lovely young lady." She sat down next to me and waited for me to go on. Ah my mum, god bless her. I had never really told her I was gay, but as it seemed I didn't need to, she already knew anyway. This was the first time in my life I was grateful for her hippie attitude, she didn't give a fuck who I was with boy or girl as long as I was happy. Even if she did she wouldn't need to worry; Emily was way out of my league.

"Yeah Emily. She's great mum, caring, loving, intelligent and so beautiful." I wasn't really ready to reveal more and my mum sensed it as she just took my hands in hers and squeezed encouragingly. "People who make us happy are never the people we expect so if you find someone you've got to cherish it. She left this, don't let her go, love." With that she put a small white note into my right hand, stood up and walked into the kitchen. She started rambling on about something, probably her perfect night with Kieran, but I didn't listen. All my attention was drawn to the piece of paper I was currently clutching in my hand_**: I'm so sorry Naoms, but I can't. **__Does this mean she wants to? Wants me? No, it can't she's far too great to like somebody like me that way. But what if she does? Maybe there is a chance for us. _I had to find out. I'd never forgive myself if I just gave up without knowing what could have been if I had confronted her, if I had been just more persistent. I came to the decision that I had to be strong and just ask her outright.

**XXX**

It was Monday morning and I was determined to go through with my plan. I hadn't heard anything from Emily the whole weekend. Although several times I had been on the verge of texting or calling her, I had resisted. I needed to speak to her in person and I had also wanted to give her some time to think things over. Standing in front of the backdoor of college I lit one cigarette after another, I didn't usually chain-smoke but desperate times need desperate measures. I was so fucking nervous I couldn't stop myself from going through all I wanted to say in my head over and over again. But w_hat if this is the wrong decision? What if she's not ready for it? What if I screw everything up? Wouldn't it be better to be just friends with her than not having her in my life at all? What if she doesn't want to speak to me anymore?_

This uncertainty was driving me mad. If I stood there any longer I'd probably die from lung cancer before she even got here. _Well that would be an easy way out, just passing away – And before you ask: no I'm not considering committing suicide. I'm not that desperate, well maybe I am desperate and pathetic and clingy- oh my god we aren't even together and I'm like one of those creepy, clingy girlfriends arghhh. _That was when I saw a flash of vibrant red – Emily. _Oh fuck she's here. What am I gonna say? Calm down Naomi you can do it, just be calm._ She was walking in my direction, but I doubted she had spotted me just yet. She looked stunning, as always: a high waisted, black skirt and black tights in combination with a dark purple top and a grey cardigan. I took one last drag from my fag, tossed it away and walked up to her. As soon as Emily noticed me her eyes went wide and she kept looking onto the floor.

"Emily." I breathed out. Now was the moment of truth.

"Naomi hi, listen I'm sorry for running away it's just I didn't know what else to do and you have to understand that we-we can't…"

"Yeah Em you already said that, but does this mean – I mean what I'm trying to ask is – would you ahm want to?" I couldn't stand to look at her in case her answer would be no, I was not sure if I could take that. She sighed "Naomi, it doesn't matter what I want or don't want, it's just wrong."

"But it doesn't feel wrong, not for me anyway." I needed her to know this; I needed her to know that I had never ever felt like this before. I glanced up and her expression stunned me somewhat: she seemed to be torn between what she felt and what she thought was right. Her eyes reflected pain, desperation, fear and so many other emotions. I was surprised it was even possible for one person to feel so much at the same time.

"Please Em, let's just try." It came out as only a whisper. _Please say yes, please say yes, please! _

"Naomi, under these circumstances…I…why don't we just…we should just stick to being friends. Believe me it's better that way. And someday you'll find someone, someone who is your age and interested in the same things as you and you'll be happy." It sounded not really convincing, maybe she just tried to persuade herself, because her eyes betrayed her. They screamed _No, don't believe me, that's not what I want! _Why couldn't she just tell me?

"I don't want someone at my age, I want you." _Oh my god, I've done it, I told her. Please don't reject me!_

Our eyes locked for a brief moment and hers glistened with unshed tears again. It reminded me of Friday evening just before she had kissed me but somehow I had a feeling that wasn't what she had in mind now.

"I can't Naomes, I'm sorry", she more sobbed that spoke. Well, I'm not going to lie this hurt like fucking hell. I had put myself out there; I had told her I wanted her, I had opened up to her. With these 5 words she had managed to stop my heart from beating and not in a good way. _That's it, I tried and it didn't work._ I couldn't bear to look at her anymore, but I had promised myself something and I wasn't going to break that promise.

"I'll fight, Em. I told you I won't give up on you." With one last glance into her deep brown orbs I turned away and walked into the building.


	7. Chapter 7

**Yeah, yeah short again I know, but otherwise it wouldn't fit believe me ;)**

**Thanks again for the reviews I really didn't expect so much positive feedback, you're all great! :)**

**LoveNAOMILY – Ah endlich ein bisschen Deutsch :D Kommst du auch aus Österreich?**

**Chapter 7: Naomi's POV**

Sitting in classroom, I zoomed out once again; I had a tendency to do this when there was something I considered more important than the crap my teacher was going on about. This time my mind brought me to Emily, of course. I had done the right thing I had known it the moment I'd looked into her beautiful brown eyes. They were telling me all I needed to know, there was a chance for us, there had to be. Now I was sure, she did feel the same way about me, maybe not that strong but at least she felt something, something beyond friendship. My new mission was to get her to tell me what that really was, not what she thought was right but her true emotions. I knew it would be hard, but I had to take the challenge step by step, no matter how small they were. We would come to the point where I'd get my reward and something told me it would be more than worth the wait. I smiled satisfied with my achievement. My mum had been right, I couldn't let her go. So I had to romance her a little bit (okay more than a little bit). I had to make her see herself through my eyes. I had to show her how much I wanted this to work. _Well, good so far, but how are you gonna manage this? _This was the hard part, I had never been outstanding creative, but now I had to be for my own sake.

"Naomi! Naomi? HEY!" The sudden voice startled me and my mind snapped back to the moment. "Yes, what?" "The bell rang about 5 minutes ago. I think you should stop daydreaming and head to your net lesson." Mr. Brown my History teacher told me. "Oh yes, thanks Sir." Woah had I really missed a whole hour without even noticing it? _Yeah well this is what Emily does to you. _

Strolling along the corridors I decided to skip this next lesson, whatever it was I wouldn't be able to concentrate anyway. Without really meaning to I found myself in front of the back entrance, _our place_. Stepping outside I lit a fag and perched myself on the steps. Exhaling my first drag I spotted something, no someone lying under the tree Emily had kicked before I had first kissed her. This memory brought a small smile to my lips. Approaching, I recognized Cook smoking a spliff and starring into the sky. Cook – he was an obnoxious, repulsive little prick but he had a heart of gold. He was the person nearest to a friend I had, but I had really neglected him the last weeks; he didn't deserve that, so I sat down beside him.

"Ey Blondie, what's up? Missing the Cookiemonster already?" He still didn't look at me. "Hey Cook" I chose to ignore the last part, as long as he didn't call me _babe_, it was okay. "I was a bit busy the last weeks…"

"Life ha?"

"Yeah life, what are you doing here anyway?"

"Enjoying my freedom, Blondie. Ya should try it once and again." He exhaled slowly and passed me the spilff wordlessly. I took a deep drag and gave it back. This was us, we didn't have to fill the silence with words, with Cook I could just let myself be. He wasn't nosy and after any good rumour, but if I needed him he was there for me. With Cook it was just simple as that.

"Sick of those fuckers, who believe they're something better?" Now our gazes met and he raised his eyebrow in a silent question. He knew that wasn't really what was bothering me, but he wouldn't ask for something I wasn't ready to tell him so he waited until I would be.

"Yeah", I simply responded and he resumed watching the sky. Someday I'd tell him, tell him about Emily.

"Why's life so fucking complicated, Cook?"

"It isn't you just make it, Blondie. Look at me", he raised his arms trying to present something "easy", he concluded. Yeah, easy, maybe in Cook's eyes it really was.

**XXX**

It was evening and I hadn't seen Emily again, but perhaps it was better that way. Today was quite emotional, we both needed to cool down a bit. However this gave me some time to think about my plan and work out the details. I already knew what my first step would be, as we had found out, we both liked _Pride and Prejudice_ I had decided to find fitting quotes, write them down and send them to her. (I know, I know this might sound cheesy, but isn't that what you are supposed to be, romancing somebody?).

The first was already written down and attached to a deep burgundy rose (symbol for unconscious beauty): _Affectation of candour is common enough— one meets with it everywhere. But to be candid without ostentation or design— to take the good of everybody's character and make it still better, and say nothing of the bad— belongs to you alone._

Granted I was nervous, but I hoped she liked it and wouldn't think of it as ridiculous. I wanted to deliver them myself so I grabbed it and ran down the stairs.

"Mum! Mum, I'm out, but I won't be long", I shouted and shut the front door behind me. I was really glad I knew where Emily lived, about a week ago she had invited me and we had cooked dinner together and just talked the whole night. Another thing I loved about her, I wasn't normally a talkative person, but with Emily it was different, everything was. We could just chat and laugh about the most stupid things, but we could also have a serious conversation discussing anything and everything. I had never met anybody like her before and I was pretty sure I wouldn't in the future. _She's just it._

I placed the rose onto the doormat and went back home.

**XXX**

Morning again, I hoped it was going to be a good one. I was already a little late for college but I didn't give a fuck. All I could think about was Emily's reaction to my little gift_. Did she like it? Does she know it is from me? Does she recognize the quote? _All questions I needed an answer to, and I was about to get them when I stopped dead in my tracks, a lump instantly forming in my throat. I couldn't believe my eyes, no that wasn't possible, she wouldn't do that to me, she couldn't. I was frozen in place, unable to move I watched all my dreams and hopes shatter into pieces right in front of me. My eyes began to sting, knowing what that meant I finally found the strength to turn away. Without looking back I ran, away from this sight which was definitely burnt into my eyes until I died, away from the pain, away from the disappointment; away from Emily.

**So what has Emily done? Any guesses? :D**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hahahaha your guesses were awesome, really amusing (**_**djyxa**__** – **_**yours absolutely cracked me up) :D**

**Thanks for posting them. To be honest I'm a bit anxious about that one…I hope you won't be disappointed…please tell me if you are**

_**LoveNAOMILY **_**– Ja du hast Recht Nachbarn sind wir, ich lebe noch in Österreich ;) Finds toll, dass ich mal auf Deutsch mit wem schreiben kann :D Obwohl mich Englisch natürlich auch nicht stört **

_**Smcl**_** – Wow 5 Jahre muss ja voll anstrengend gewesen sein. Ich denke Deutsch ist relativ schwer zu lernen…Respekt :)**

**Chapter 8: Emily's POV**

_How could I do that to her? To me? How could I be so stupid? I screwed everything up. I bet she doesn't want to talk to me ever again, I couldn't blame her._

Sitting on my bed I grabbed the rose from my nightstand and smelled on it. _So beautiful_. Fidgeting with the small note I had detached from it I tried to not give in to temptation, it would only hurt me more if I read it again. _Well you deserve it, don't you? _That's when I simply couldn't hold my tears back anymore, they immediately cascaded down my cheeks, I'm pretty sure you could compare me to waterfall by now. Sobbing I watched as they dripped down onto the quote, mingling with the dark ink and slowly clearing it away. That's just what I had done to our relationship, I had erased it. _Wait relationship? It wasn't a relationship! But we definitely had something special, a special bond? Yeah that's it. Not anymore Emily, you ruined it._

New droplets escaped, only this time I was careful not to let them come in contact with the paper; I wanted to keep it. Even if I had lost her I wanted to never forget that I once had had somebody who considered me important enough to send me this. It was special, just like her.

I closed my puffy, red-rimmed eyes and sank exhausted into my pillows, burrowing my face in them. No matter how much I tried to avoid it I couldn't stop thinking about the events of the last days:

_It was morning and the bright sunlight blinded me, squinting I surveyed my surroundings trying to figure out where I was. It wasn't until I heard a light snore beneath me that it hit me: Naomi – Kissing – Cuddling – Fuck! How could I let that happen? I had promised myself to don't cave. _Yeah Emily, you are so very in control of yourself. _Shaking my head I tried to get rid of the unpleasant thoughts. Soon enough I felt a familiar panic rise inside me: My mouth went dry and my hands started to tremble slightly. Shit, I had to get out of here. Picking up my bag and jacked I practically ran out the door. Outside I released a breath I didn't even realise I was holding and jogged without hesitation in the direction of the bus stop. I didn't want to go back to mine, Katie was out probably fucking her newest boyfriend, and it was far too quiet there at the moment. I needed Effy, she would know what to do – she always did. _

**XXX**

_Panting I came to a stop in front of my best friend's house, I knocked impatiently._

"_Effy! Effy, open the fucking door!" I shouted._

_A few seconds later it swung open revealing a groggy looking Effy, dressed in only a tank top and boxer shorts. "What the hell, Emily? Do you know what time it is? Six o'clock, you understand me? SIX!"_

"_Yeah I understand, now let me in I need your advice."_

"_I can't fucking believe it. What is important enough to wake me at six o'clock on a Saturday?", she asked grumpily, closing the front door behind me._

"_I kissed her Eff. And we cuddled. And then we fell asleep snuggled into each other."_

"_Well that's fantastic and I'm really happy you found someone, but couldn't you wait until, let's say midday, with your great revelation?", she asked calmly smirking at me._

"_Don't you understand Eff? I wasn't supposed to….I shouldn't have….it's not possible…"_

"_Jesus Ems, take a breath wouldn't want you to faint now would we?"_

_I simply couldn't hold it in any longer, so I exploded: "FOR FUCK'S SAKE, STOP BEEING SO FUCKING CALM! This could cost me my job!"_

"_Emily, you seriously have to sort out your priorities." With this she turned around and sauntered off, to the kitchen._

"_What is that supposed to mean? EFF!" I followed her and slumped down onto one of the chairs._

_Effy rummaged around a bit and put on the kettle. "Tea?"_

"_No! I don't want your fucking tea I want you to tell me what I should do!"_

_She sighed and looked me deep into the eyes an unreadable expression on her face. "I can't do that Ems. You have to decide for yourself, but remember that rules are there to break them and they don't necessarily have to be right."_

"_What is it with you and these cryptic answers? Can't you just tell me straight what you think is the right thing to do?"_

"_Of course I could but then it would be right for me and not for you. Tea?"_

_Resting my head in my hands I mumbled: "Yeah, give me a fucking cup then."_

_Turned out the tea really helped a bit, not with my decision of course but to calm down. Running my fingertips over the rim of my steaming mug I tried to order my thoughts. I instantly felt guilty when my anger dissipated, I shouldn't have screamed at her like that. I looked up to find Effy's gaze already on me, frowning and worry evident in her eyes._

"_I'm sorry Eff, I shouldn't have…"_

"_No it's okay Ems, I understand." She interrupted me smiling sympathetically. _

**XXX**

_I spent the night at Effy's, not really sleeping but pondering nonstop what I would tell Naomi and how I wanted us to go on from there. Friends? That wasn't a possibility anymore. I knew I wouldn't be able to go through with it, I simply liked her way too much. But what options were left? Avoiding her? I could try but I doubted it would work; I was too weak to stay away from her. Giving in and being with her? That was definitely what my heart told me to do (yeah sounds cheesy I know, but it is the truth), but there was still the problem with my conscience always telling me it was the wrong thing to do. What kind of relationship would that be? A secret, forbidden one, I didn't want it to become my dirty little secret. We couldn't tell anyone ever, we couldn't be openly affectionate; we couldn't spend time together as a couple in public. No, I didn't want that, it would tear us both apart on the inside. Quitting my job? Yeah of course I could but this had always been my dream job, I had spent the last years working towards it. Could I be happy giving it up? Or worse would I blame her? No I couldn't do that._

_Annoyed with myself and the dilemma I was in I tried to shut the thoughts out and get some sleep. There was still Sunday to think about all this and it would be easier to make a decision being well-rested. _

**XXX**

_It was Monday morning and I had spent my whole weekend at Effy's trying to find the perfect solution, but I couldn't think of anything._

_We were now sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast. "Decision made, then?"_

"_Arh I wish you wouldn't have brought it up again."_

"_Sorry to disappoint you then. So what are you gonna do?"_

"_I don't know Eff, I'm still none the wiser." I sighed exasperatedly. _

"_Sorry to hear that", she simply said and began reading the newspaper._

"_Well, I don't know what exactly to do but I have an idea."_

"_So?", she sounded less than interested, but I knew it was just show._

"_So I'm going to make her let me alone."_

"_Will you? And how are you gonna archive this?"_

"_That's the part I haven't worked out yet."_

"_Mmmh I see." She took a sip from her coffee and turned her attention back to the paper. _

_What could I do to make Naomi stop acting like that, to make her stop wanting me?_

_It had to be something shocking, something she wouldn't forgive me, something that showed there was no future for us…_

"_Oh my god I've got it!", I exclaimed triumphantly._

_Effy looked up and raised her eyebrows in confusion._

"_And what would that be?"_

"_Eff I need a favour."_

**XXX**

_I was really fucking nervous. Effy and I were standing at the back door waiting for Naomi. I started to pace and bit my nails. A disgusting habit I hadn't been able to give up. _

"_Emily, stop it. You don't make it any better."_

"_I know, I know, it's just I don't want to hurt her…"_

"_You don't have to, you know."_

"_Please Eff, I've made my decision try and accept it."_

"_Oh I do, otherwise I wouldn't be helping you, although I think it's the most stupid idea you've ever had. Even more stupid than back then when we were 6 and you tried to paint the cat red 'cause it was your favourite colour, but Katie made your parents buy a white one."_

"_Shut up Eff, I was 6."_

"_Just saying."_

_A few minutes passed, mostly spent in silence._

"_Ems, what did you say she looked like? Tall, light blonde hair and incredibly long legs?"_

"_Yeah that's her, why?"_

"_She's coming then."_

"_What? Oh fuck! Really? Are you sure?"_

"_Positive."_

_I stepped closer to her and whispered in her ear: "Do it then."_

"_You sure?", she whispered back._

_I leaned forward slightly "Yes."_

_Effy slung her arms around my neck, while I put my hands on the small of her back. We stared in each other's eyes for a second before she leaned in and captured my lips with hers._

A new swell of tears rolled down my cheeks, by now I was already shaking with sobs but I couldn't bring myself to stop crying. I had ruined the best thing that had ever happened to me.

**So what do you think? Will Naomi forgive Ems?**


	9. Chapter 9

**Soo, next chapter then… thanks to all of you for sticking with this story, I promise there are better times to come ;) **

Chapter 9: Naomi's POV

I felt numb, like literally numb. I had been lying on my bed for hours now, not able to move or think about anything else than this goddamn scene, replaying in my mind over and over again. Keeping my eyes on the ceiling I watched the shadows change when a car drove by, illuminating my otherwise dark room here and there. I couldn't even cry anymore, I felt like all the tears I had, had already been shared and now the only thing I could do was feel it. Feel it all, the pain, the disappointment in Emily and myself. How could I be stupid enough to believe she actually liked me. A woman like Emily – me .No it simply wasn't possible. And now I paid the price for my infinite optimism (well you could also call it stupidity). By now she was probably laughing about me and my rose with this fucking girlfriend of hers. _Why didn't she tell me? I would've backed off had I known. _The fact that the brunette she was with was rather gorgeous made everything just worse. _Of course, she could have anyone she wants, why would she choose you? Plain, old boring Naomi? _The answer was she wouldn't and she apparently hadn't. It seemed like all the strength had been taken from me and now there was only a shell left. Suddenly I sat up, no I couldn't let myself be so down. I had to move on, just like always. I had done it before, I could do it again. I was well aware that all of this were just lies, lies I told myself to make me believe it wasn't a big deal. But it was and deep down I knew it. Anyway it really didn't matter because I decided I'd just pretend. Pretend everything was right, pretend nothing had happened, pretend I was fine. Couldn't be that hard, could it? Nobody would notice I'd simply function: Concentrate on coursework, try to compensate my non-existent personal life.

The only problem that was left was well, Emily herself. What would I do the next time I saw her? How would I act? What would I say to her? _Just pretend it didn't happen._ A soft voice in the back of my mind told me. _Just act nonchalantly._ I didn't even think about it properly, I just felt too weak, but I decided to listen to what the voice was telling me and pretend.

So I pushed myself off the bed, my limbs feeling strange after not moving for such a long time, and walked over to my desk. Sadly I smiled down at the slightly crumbled piece of paper I had prepared yesterday – the next quote. _Don't need it now, do I?_ Reading over it a last time I tore it up and threw it into the bin.

_**There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. My courage always rises at every attempt to intimidate me.**_

Wasn't true in the end anyway, I had given up, not exactly the actions of the stubborn girl I claimed to be.

**XXX**

_Are you loving the pain, loving the pain?  
>And with every day, every day<br>I try to move on.  
>Whatever it was,<br>Whatever it was,  
>There's nothing now.<br>You changed.  
>New Age.<em>

The last notes of Marlon Roudette's „New Age" resonated through my whole body. It had become my favourite song (okay only just since yesterday, but that's not the point), simply because it described my feelings perfectly or how I hoped to feel about it in the not so far future. I had calmed down a bit and was determined to make my plan work, _just function_. Taking my earphones out I used the front door to enter the school (for the first time since months). I didn't want to see Emily if she was waiting like always. I had also decided to avoid her if possible. Of course she was still my English teacher and there was no chance to escape that, but I didn't have to torture myself intentionally by meeting her. _English, oh fuck. _It was my first lesson. Well, I had to prove myself then.

Arriving at class I tried to collect myself. _You can do it, Naomi. Just stay strong._ Keeping my eyes down I fidgeted with my hands, I desperately needed a distraction. But what could I do? There wasn't really much to focus on, was there? And that's when Emily entered the room. I couldn't prevent my eyes from shooting up briefly. Oh my god she looked…well awful: Messy hair, dark circles around the eyes - she seemed exhausted, tired. _What's wrong with her? Is she ill? What happened? I hope it isn't something too bad. No Naomi, you don't care!_

Somehow she still managed to look quite beautiful, it had to be a special gift of hers – always looking so fucking beautiful. I was ripped out of my thoughts when our eyes connected over the room. She stared intently at me and my breath involuntarily hitched. I simply couldn't stop my body from reacting to her no matter what I resolved to do. I quickly brought my gaze back to my hands, it was safer that way.

The hour passed by and I couldn't concentrate on one single word she said, the only thing my mind focused on was her warm raspy voice. _What? She has a great voice. _When the bell finally rang I gathered my belongings and was just about to leave when she spoke up.

"Naomi, do you have a minute?" _Oh no, please don't. No, no, no, no, no_

"Actually I don't_." _Yeah I knew it was rude but I didn't care, she had hurt me.

Emily frowned and looked pleadingly at me. "Please Naoms, I need to talk to you", she spoke in a lower voice now so nobody else would hear, although all the other students had already left.

I sighed exasperatedly. "Okay, what do you want?"

She remained silent for a few moments, just watching me. Then she slowly stepped closer, our bodies almost touching. I immediately felt the familiar surge of electricity running through me, settling in the pit of my stomach. "I'm sorry Naoms. I'm so so sorry." She went to put her hand on my shoulder but I flinched away. A hurt expression took over her face, but she quickly controlled herself again.

"There's nothing to be sorry about Miss Fitch. If you don't mind, I have to go to my next class now." I swiftly turned around, but her hand gripping my wrist held me in place.

"Please don't do that Naoms." Only a whisper. Freeing my arm I shook my head and left her standing there. I had to be strong now.

**Please take a second to review, I'd like to know what you think **


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks again for all your support. That's what is motivating me to keep on writing this **

**I had a really shit day so just to warn you this chapter may reflect it a bit.**

_**Sexpistols**_** – I hope your exam went well, though. Wouldn't want it to be my fault if not :D**

**It's Emily's point of view and as most of you seem to be on Naomi's side I hope you'll understand Ems a bit better after this ;)**

Chapter 10: Emily's POV

Days flew by and it seemed that Naomi had decided to not speak to me outside of class. I had tried everything: I had apologized (not only once), I had explained it to her, I had told her I now wanted to be more than friends. But it didn't change anything for her, or so she had told me. I still couldn't believe how stupid I had been, I should have listened to Effy. She had been right – she always was, but nooo silly Emily had to be stubborn and go through with her bloody "plan". I think it's true what people say about just realising what you had (or in my case could have had) when you lost it. Yeah I had lost her and it was absolutely my fucking fault. Naomi had been nothing but lovely to me; she had made me laugh like nobody else before her, I could talk to her about everything and anything without feeling uncomfortable, we could spent days together without getting on each other's nerves, we could remain silent and just enjoy the other's presence. Never had I felt so connected with somebody, so understood by somebody, but no I had to go and ruin it by hurting the only person who wouldn't ever do anything to upset me. _Bit masochistic, are we? _Yeah this was the worst of all I couldn't bring the voice in the back of my mind to shut the fuck up, always reminding me of my mistake, always making me feel so fucking guilty. Guilt – that was a feeling I had become used to, it was there all the time, never fading, never disappearing. Every time I looked at my gorgeous blonde - _She's not yours Emily and now she never will be. _

"SUTH UP! JUST LEAVE ME ALIONE!", I screamed throwing the essay I was currently reading (okay, okay I had been trying to read) onto the floor. Tears sprang to my eyes and I did nothing to stop them from falling, there was no point; I deserved this.

Suddenly the door swung open revealing a fuming Katie.

"What the fuck Emsy?" Upon seeing the state I was in her features immediately softened and she stepped inside my room. Turing away from her I tried to hide my make-up stained cheeks, I hadn't had the nerve to clean myself up. _Woah, I must look like shit if she's pulling her "concerned face"._

"It's nothing Katie, just knocked something over accidentally. You can go and resume shoving your tongue down – what's his name? Ralph? Whatever go back to him."

"He's not here Emsy, I thought we could have a girly day. Watching one of those romantic comedies you love so much, eating pizza, drinking and smoking a shit load of weed." She smiled at me.

"Are you being serious? Careful there, you nearly sound concerned." I spat at her.

Her eyes widened in shock. "I am concerned, bitch. You're still my baby sister and I can see there's something wrong Emsy. You haven't eaten in days now and don't think I can't hear you crying yourself to sleep every night. Ah, and you look like shit. So what's the matter?"

"Well thanks Katie always one for compliments, aren't you?"

"And the bitchiness, forgot about that. Ems, that's so out of character for you, it really doesn't suite you."

I just groaned in response, now really wasn't the right time for Katie to remember she actually had a sister; I just wanted to be alone. Hoping she would leave I walked back to my bed, slumping down on it_. Ah, no such luck there._

Katie just sat down beside me and almost immediately I was enveloped in a big Fitch-hug. At first I tried to fight it, but I had to admit it felt good, being held by somebody. It felt like finally there was a force holding me together again.

"Shhh Ems, everything will be alright", she said kissing my hair and rubbing calming circles on my back. It seemed like I had started to cry once again. Wow I didn't even notice it. _Suppose I'm getting used to the feeling. _I now was full on sobbing into Katie's shoulder, her blouse would definitely be ruined after this, but surprisingly she didn't seem to care.

"It's okay Ems. Just lie down and I'll make you a cup of tea." She went to stand up, but I held her back.

"Please, just – just stay here…with me." My voice sounded so weak I didn't even recognize it anymore.

She bent down stroked my hair and planted a kiss on my forehead.

"Okay, I'll stay then. Scoot over." I did and we just lay there when I slowly drifted into a dreamless, exhausted sleep.

**XXX**

Squinting I woke up. Feeling the warmth of another body beside me I turned my head and was met with a deeply sleeping Katie, mouth slightly agape she let out quiet snores. I smiled, I knew she could be a real bitch when she wanted to but what she'd done for me yesterday was just amazing. I couldn't remember when we had last slept in one bed, but it was good to know that she was still there for me if I needed her. Just like when we had been kids, every time I was afraid of the dark or the monster, I was convinced lived under my bed, I would creep into her bed and snuggled into her. I definitely had to thank her and supposing the best way to do just that was to make her breakfast and then spend a whole day shopping together, I started with the easier out of those two.

Rummaging around in the kitchen my stomach grumbled rather loudly. Patting it slightly I smiled to myself_. Looks like I could do with some food too._ Katie had been right when she had said I hadn't properly eaten in days; I just didn't feel up to it. Well that seemed to have changed. Admittedly I really felt way better than yesterday (and the days before). Maybe that was all I needed, to know that there was still somebody who loved me, somebody who hadn't rejected me.

Putting on the kettle I made a decision: I'd stop moping and start fighting. Just like Naomi had told me she would. Now it was my turn to show her just how much she meant to me. Starting today.

**XXX**

I had decided to play her game and send her a quote in return. I knew this wouldn't be enough, of course not, but it was a beginning.

_"__**In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.**__"_

That was the original, but after thinking it over I changed it slightly. I didn't know if what I was feeling could be called love, not yet anyway. Even if it was, I wanted to tell her myself when the time was right, I wanted to be able to look her into the eyes and see her reaction. So that's what I made of it:

_"__**In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire you.**__"_

Smiling I put it in an envelope and kissed it. I'll win her trust back step by step even if it costs me ages.

**So…thoughts, wishes, complaints, anything? :D**


	11. Chapter 11

**Wow, already chapter 11. I honestly didn't think I would continue this, but as you seem to like it… **

**Actually I should be doing my shit load of English homework, but hey it's still English ;D**

**Thanks to Alice, sexpistols, amy, fookyeahskins and loveNAOMILY for reviewing **

Chapter 11: Naomi's POV

It was now a week since _the incidence_ as I referred to it in my mind and I had to admit that my life had become pretty monotonous. It was always the same – getting up, going to school – coming home – studying – reading or listening to music – going back to sleep. There was nothing that brightened my day, nothing that made me laugh, nothing that made me forget about the shit reality currently was. At this point I started to question what was missing, what had made my days special? As soon as this thought formed in my mind I knew the answer: Emily.

I had always woken up thinking about her, about if I would see her in college, if we would talk, if we would laugh together, if we'd hang out later on – Emily, it was always just Emily.

Annoyed with myself I rolled over in bed, burying my head in my duvet. _Stop thinking about her! It's no good. _Yeah, I knew this of course I did, but I just couldn't help it and seeing her in class definitely wasn't conducive to improve the situation. Another thing that was out of my control, I really couldn't avoid her absolutely. _Still thinking 'bout her…_

Groaning I stood up, and looked for anything I could distract me with. Reading? No, didn't feel up to it. Listening to some music? Nah, music always reminded me of Emily somehow. Going out? Too tired. Watching TV? No, would most certainly not be interesting enough to stop my thoughts from wandering. Well what was left? I couldn't think of anything. _Great, just great._

At a loss for anything else to do I looked at my phone, randomly scrolling through the numbers. _Em. _Maybe I should just call her, tell her that I had forgiven her and wanted to see her. Contemplating the pros and cons my thump hovered over the small green phone. _Do it, just do it. Don't you dare Naomi! _Two voices were arguing in my head and I started to think that maybe I was schizophrenic – off to the loony bin it is then.

The ringing of the doorbell interrupted my internal battle. _Who could that be? Oh please none of our former "lodgers"…. _

Sighing I went downstairs to get it, but when I opened the front door there was nobody to be seen. Turning my head left and right I was just about to go back in when something lying on the doormat caught my eye. Lilies. Beautiful white and light pink lilies. _Wow, they're amazing! Maybe mum has finally found someone who is worth her. _I picked them up and smelled, amazing. I loved lilies; they really were my favourite ones, but who'd be sending me flowers? Nobody. Shaking my head slightly disappointed I put them into a vase and placed it on the table, so my mum would immediately see them when she got home.

**XXX**

"Naomi! I'm home love!" Ah my mum. Thinking about how unnecessary it was to announce her arrival I rolled my eyes. I had heard the door slamming shut and who else would it be. Shaking my head I resumed reading, only to be interrupted by her again.

"Naomi, where are those flowers from?" Pff like she didn't know, they had to be from one of her suitors. Yeah, compared to me my mum was rather sociable, with her warm brown eyes and her inviting smile. She was just the open kind of person, the kind everyone likes in an instant. _Well didn't inherit that, did you?_

"NAOMI! Don't pretend you can't hear me, I know you can!" Of course I could it would be impossible not to. Putting my book to the side I decided to go downstairs before she might have the idea to come up. I hated it when somebody invaded my personal space and yes I count my room in. If I came to her I could at least leave whenever I wanted to. Leaning on the doorframe I watched as she admired the lilies, they really were beautiful. I coughed to make my presence known and she turned around to face me.

"Thanks dear, but what are they for? Never thought you were a flower girl." I looked doubtfully at her trying to gauge if she was serious. Upon seeing a playful glint in her eyes I burst out laughing. "Yeah well seems like there's much you don't know about me. Oh yeah and I forgot to tell you I'm going to buy a VW bus paint flowers all over it and then I'm going to try and persuade anyone who'll listen that love is all around", I replied dryly. "Very funny, love. So?"

"I don't know mum, somebody put them on the doormat and left. Figured you'd know, but as it seems you have so many suitors that you don't even remember all of them."

"Ah what a refreshing humour my daughter has." I just rolled my eyes.

She turned back to the lilies examining them closely. Just as I wanted to go back to my room, she shouted excitedly: "There's a card!" I had to admit I was a bit curious myself so I stayed. She read it through, but instead of smiling as I expected her to a frown appeared on her face.

"What's wrong mum?"

"Oh, nothing dear it's just I don't really get it." I walked over to her.

"Let me see", I demanded and she handed me the envelope. It was rather big actually; I couldn't help but wonder how I could miss it.

_"__**In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire you.**__"_

That's when my heart stopped and my fingers felt suddenly quite cold. Where to my mum, it didn't make any sense I immediately recognized it. Not believing my eyes I read it over and over again until there was no doubt left – it was a quote. A quote from Pride and Prejudice. A quote Emily must have sent me.

"Are you okay sweetheart? You're looking a bit pale all of a sudden." Blinking I was pulled out of my reverie. "Am…yeah I – I'm…ehm…fine mum", I stuttered.

She studied me, a worried expression on her face. "If you say so love"

"I'm just gonna go back to my room." And I practically ran out of the kitchen, quote still in hand.

"I'll call for you when dinner is ready!", my mum shouted after me but I barely noticed it.

**XXX**

So here's my plan for today:

Meet Emily

Ask her about the flowers and the quote

Stay strong and don't give in

Somehow I was convinced the last part would be the hardest one. After my surprise had subsided I had been ecstatic. It seemed like she had decided to make an effort at last and I couldn't hide how happy I was about that fact. Emily hadn't given up; she tried to make it up to me. I really had to stop myself from calling her straight away, but I managed to resist the urge (Took a large amount of willpower, believe me). And now here I was standing at the back entrance of the college for the first time since _the incident_, trying to stop my nerves from getting the better of me. I was smoking my third cigarette already while pacing up and down. _How will she react? Will she admit right away that it was her who sent the flowers? Why did she send them in the first place? Just to apologize, trying to stay friends or because she hopes we could be more? _My mind was racing, how could just the prospect of speaking to her make me feel like this? _You're pathetic Naomi. _Oh my god I really was, but there was nothing I could do about it; it's not like I hadn't tried. _Calm Naomi, just breath: in and out. There, it's not that difficult. _

"You're Naomi." A voice behind my back startled me. It wasn't a question but a statement; I turned around and came face to face with that brunette slag, who had been snogging Emily's face off. Wow, she really was gorgeous and somehow enigmatic. Her blue eyes boring into mine she seemed all seeing and all knowing. It made me shift uncomfortably, I kept people at bay, I didn't let anyone in, didn't let anyone behind my walls and this woman seemed to manage to break them down with only one look. It scared me. She furrowed her brows and smirked at me.

"Cat got your tongue?"

"Who the fuck are you?", she was truly annoying me now.

"Oh I think we already met each other", she answered lighting a fag. I scoffed.

"Wouldn't call you snogging my English teacher that"

"Mh feisty, I like it. Just remember she's a genuinely nice person and she did just what she thought was right. She wouldn't hurt anybody intentionally." With that she turned around and walked away.

_What the fuck? Who does she think she is? What does she know? Had Emily told her? Ah, don't be silly Naomi what would Emily tell _her _about you?_

Great, now I was even more nervous than before.

"Naomi?" Mhpf not again.

"WHAT?"

"I just – I…sorry I'm gonna go" _Oh fuck._

"No Emily wait, I thought you were…", I trailed off.

"Who?"

"What?"

"You thought I was who?" She looked curiously at me.

"Ah, never mind." I shook my head to clear my thoughts. _Ah the plan, right._

"Thanks for the flowers by the way", I desperately tried to sound nonchalant. Her face instantly lit up, breaking in a huge smile.

"You liked them?"

"Yeah, it was a nice gesture. Didn't expect you to remember, that lilies are my favourites."

She stepped closer, reaching a hand out and interlacing our fingers. Smiling she looked up at me; it was the first time I didn't flinch away.

"Of course I remember, I remember everything you told me Naoms", her voice was soft and somehow pleading.

"Do you?" I replied coldly in order to keep up my act.

"Yeah, I do", she aspirated. I closed my eyes allowing myself to relish the moment. I know, I know I had planned to stay strong and shit, but would you be able to go through with it when the woman of your dreams was holding your hand? So don't judge me.

After what seemed like an eternity I let go of her, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

"I have to go to class, Emily" turning around I left her standing there a second time, only now I was smiling.

**Please let me know what you think and if you have any guesses where I might take this story – post them^^**


	12. Chapter 12

**Heey, sorry for the wait but I have just soo many tests at the moment I really don't know where to begin with studying -.-**

**Thanks to **_**Beck89, Crazy2592, LoveNAOMILY, Fookyeahskins, damntheman34, silentlivedevil, Alice, smcl and TG.**_** You're all great and I really appreciate your reviews **

_**Silentlivedevil**_** – Oh noch jemand, der Deutsch kann :D Ich freu mich auch immer wenn ich mal einfach nur drauf los schreiben kann…es geht zwar auf Englisch auch, Deutsch ist und bleibt aber natürlich einfacher für mich ;)**

**Chapter 12: Naomi's POV:**

*ring, ring*

ARRRGH morning already. _No, no, no just one more second!_ I was fucking tired and I didn't even know why it was not like I had done anything exhausting, it had been just a normal week. Okay, okay maybe I had a bit of a sleep deficit, it seemed like I just couldn't calm down anymore. Even if I tried to relax, closing my eyes and thinking about nothing (Yeah I know that's not possible, because if you try to rid your brain of all thoughts you still think about thinking nothing, woah how many times did I just use the word think?) after a while there would always be a certain redhead occupying my mind. Then I'd look at the amazing flowers now standing on my bedside table, which was anything but helpful. Groaning I pushed the snooze button for the second time, I was not ready to get up just yet. Rolling to my side I started my silent countdown: 10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1-0._ Up, up Naomi!_

_Urgh, well let's face the world then._ Sitting up I rubbed my eyes, blinking furiously to avoid the bright daylight shining through my window.

10 minutes later I headed downstairs. Wow a new record: showering, changing, tooth brushing and putting on make-up in 10 minutes! I was impressed. With a quick glance at the clock I realised that I hadn't any time for my morning coffee. _Fuck, I __need__ my daily dose of caffeine. Bad luck, you should have stood up earlier. _Well this day was already beginning very bad, could only get better. Couldn't it?

Pulling open the door I was stunned to see a waiting Emily outside.

"Emily, what are you doing here?" I closed the door behind me and shot her a questioning look.

"Morning Naoms. Well, I thought I'd drop by and…well" trailing off she practically shoved a steaming cup of what presumably was coffee in my hand.

"I brought you coffee, as I know you need it in the morning", she smiled shyly at me.

"Oh Em, you're a lifesaver, I hadn't enough time to drink one."

Her smile brightened, now reaching her deep brown eyes. _Oh my god she was so fucking beautiful! No, stop it! _Shaking my head I sipped on the hot liquid: Latte Macchiato with a slight vanilla flavour, just as I liked it.

"I could – you know – give you a ride", she said gesturing insecurely to her moped. I raised my eyebrows in surprise.

"Wouldn't it look a bit suspicious if I arrived on the back of your moped?"

"Well, I'd drop you off at the end of the road so you…ahm…can walk the last bit." She blushed and looked down at her shuffling feet. _Cute._

"I suppose that's okay, otherwise I would be late anyway. So let's go then." I walked past her and waited for her to follow. Handing me a helmet she sat down and put on hers. Oh fuck, I had to hold on to something or more precisely I had to hold on to Emily. I hadn't considered that: My hands on her waist, my front pressed flush against her back. Oh that wasn't a good idea.

"You coming?" _Oh Emily, right. Just do it Naomi, you missed her. Did not! Did too!_ The two by now well-known voices in my head started to argue once again. _Definitely schizophrenic._

I decided to just blend them out and hopped onto the moped, my arms wrapping around Emily's waist in the process. Fuck did she feel good. I had almost forgotten how fragile and delicate she was. _Nope, you haven't, you're constantly thinking about that._

"Ready?" Emily's voice brought me back to reality.

"Ready", I confirmed and she started the engine.

Feeling the wind in my hair I closed my eyes and decided to just savour the moment. I tightened my grip around her and inched closer. What? I might as well make the best of it! And believe me it was one of the best feelings I was ever lucky enough to experience. I could smell her slight strawberry scent in the air and began to absentmindedly run my fingers across her hip. Feeling warm skin against my own my breath hitched - her vest must have ridden up. I quickly pulled away and placed my hand on the cloth covered area again. This had been a very bad idea, how should I be able to concentrate in my lessons for the rest of the day? We stopped at a traffic light and Emily turned her head to talk to me: „If you want us to arrive at school without any accidents you better stop doing this to me." I just stared dumbfounded at her until she grinned cheekily and faced the front again. Yep my day was really getting better.

**XXX**

It was lunchtime and just how predicted I hadn't been able to focus at all. Every time I tried to listen to what the teacher was saying my mid drifted on its own accord back to the morning events. _You've got it bad, Naomi. _Yeah I knew that, of course I did and there was no point in denying it, since I had first laid eyes on Emily there was just something intriguing, something special about her. And although I tried, I simply couldn't stay away from her for too long. It just seemed impossible to be mad at her when she looked at me with those doe eyes of hers. Being mean to her would be like killing Bambi (yeah Bambi was and hopefully will ever be the only book I cried reading…I was five so don't judge me).

All those feelings suddenly became too real; too much it was like an overload. I had to escape it, to run – I needed fresh air.

Outside of the building I almost instantly lit a fag, inhaling deeply and keeping the smoke in my lungs for a bit before exhaling. Calming down slightly I watched the small clouds escaping my mouth and disappearing slowly in the air. I closed my eyes while leaning my back against the brick wall. It was cold; I could feel it through the thin material of my top and shivered a little. Suddenly I sensed the presence of a body beside me, but I decided to keep my eyes shut. I still wasn't ready to face whoever it was.

"Enjoying the warm weather, I see." Cook said sarcastically.

"How come we always meet outside? Are you actually ever in college?"

"Well, only if it pays off." I could practically see his smirk, although my eyes remained closed.

"And when's that?", I asked curiously, opening my eyes to look at him.

"Every time that hot redheaded teacher makes an appearance", he winked and I immediately felt jealousy surging through my veins and a lump settling in my throat. I knew it was irrational, Emily was definitely gay and not interested in Cook, but I couldn't help it. My body seemed to have developed its own mind and was acting without my permission. I shook my head to clear my thoughts and tried not to be mad at Cook, he didn't know.

"Woah Naomikins I know I'm irresistible, but I'd have never thought you'd be speechless." A smug smile was playing around his lips and I immediately softened.

"Don't think too highly of yourself Cook, somebody might think you're an arrogant asshole." I now smiled too.

"Nah, everybody loves the Cookiemonster. How couldn't you?"

"Well there are many reasons. Where shall I start?" He chuckled and lit a cigarette himself.

This felt nice, I had missed the friendly banter between us; I had missed Cook. But I'd never ever admit it out aloud; somehow he seemed to know it anyway. He was always there when I needed somebody to talk to almost as if he could read my mind. _Ah, that would be scary._

A sudden buzzing startled me and I jumped a bit. _Oh my phone. _

1 new message from Em:

**Meet me for dinner? XX**

"Uhhh who's Em? You pulled, didn't ya?" Fuck, I should be more careful.

"No 'course not she's just a friend." I lied. I had never lied to Cook before, it felt terrible but he couldn't find out, no one ever could.

"When you say so." He leaned back against the wall and I felt instantly guilty. He trusted me and I had never given him any reason not to, until now that is.

**XXX**

Back in class, all I could think about was how I hadn't told Cook the truth. I lied to my only friend, I lied because of Emily. This is not how it is supposed to be when you meet somebody you like. You should be glowing from happiness and telling all your friends how amazing this person was, not ever shutting up about it. Or so I imagined it to be, I had never really experienced it myself but this was all I knew from sappy teenage movies and books. Instead I had to keep it quiet; I couldn't even let anyone know that Emily and I actually talked. This fact was hanging over me like a dark cloud overshadowing all the hope I had felt this morning. How quickly things could change….

Suddenly the girl beside me, Stacy I think nudged my shoulder pointing to a white envelope lying on my desk. Where did that come from? I hadn't noticed it when I sat down, but maybe I was just too preoccupied thinking about all the shit that was currently going on. I shot her a quick smile and nodded my head thank you. We had never talked before but she seemed like a nice girl. Curiosity overcame me and I opened the envelope revealing a white note:

**I am sorry to have occasioned pain to you. It has been most unconsciously done, however, and I hope will be of short duration.**

It was Emily's handwriting and I couldn't believe she had actually done this. We were in college, what if somebody had seen her? Seemed like she was getting careless too. I read it a second time and smiled despite myself. I hadn't texted back, considering her suggestion a bad idea. Obviously she interpreted it wrong and believed I was still angry. Maybe I was a bit, but not really she had apologized in every way possible and constantly tried to make it up to me. To be honest I had forgiven her the first time she had told me she was sorry, but I hadn't let myself show it. I hadn't wanted to make it too easy for her, but now I almost thought I had exaggerated a bit. I was sure she already felt bad enough without me being such a prick about it. Pulling out my phone I decided to accept her offer and just see where it would take us.

**Please leave a review. I'm always curious to know what you think.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Next chapter :D I'm apologizing in advance…it's really short but at least something. Thanks to Alice, Beck89, Fookyeahskins, Jhen and FiercePixie7 I'm glad you like it :)**

**Chapter 13: Emily's POV**

Dinner. I was going to have dinner with Naomi Campbell. I couldn't believe my luck, maybe she had actually forgiven me at last, maybe it wasn't too late after all. I couldn't stop smiling since she had replied; it had been simple really: **Dinner sounds good, when and where? X **

These few words from her did it; my mood was better than, well I didn't even know when I had last felt this good. The only problem now was: Where the fuck should I take her? I wanted it to be comfortable, but special. Nothing too fancy, she wouldn't like that but not just some scruffy pub either. And of course it had to be out of town, I couldn't risk being caught. Sitting down at the kitchen table I rested my head in my hands_. Okay Emily think, just think. There must be something; come on you can't screw it up again. _My train of thoughts was interrupted by a knock on the door. Who could that be? I wasn't going out with Eff today, was I? A second knock, a bit louder now, followed by infuriated banging.

"Emily open the fucking door, I know you're in it's not like you have a life outside of this shithole of a college!" Katie? What was she doing here? I thought she had a date and it was just, turning around I glanced at the clock, 11 pm. Besides she had a key. Frowning I stood up and let her in.

"What took you so long? Daydreaming about Blondie again, are we?" She stormed past me and directly into the bathroom. Ah, bad date then.

"Katie, what the fuck?", I shouted upon hearing her throwing up. She had probably drunk too much, again. Ah some people never change.

She walked out and slammed the door shut behind her. I only just now got a chance to look at her properly: death warmed up, definitely.

"What happened to you? Drank the entire bar empty?"

"Haha very funny Ems. I feel like shit." Katie walked to the couch and slumped down, rubbing her hand over her face groaning.

"Look like it as well", I commented and sat down beside her.

"Why thanks, bitch"

"So what's wrong?" I was really getting curious now, surprisingly she seemed rather sober.

"Don't know what this prick fed me but I think it gave me food poisoning or something. Even worse than that crap mum makes." I had to stifle a laugh, jap baaaaad date.

"Oh shut up lezzer, that's not funny. Only because you're dating women who most of the time happen to be a female version of Jamie Oliver doesn't mean you can take the piss."

"Well maybe you should be pickier."

"I'm nearly 25 Ems, not all of us have a seventeen year old goddess waiting." Yeah I really was lucky, Naomi was just fucking gorgeous, I still couldn't believe she was actually interested in me. I smiled.

"Are you implying you want your own 17 year old goddess?", I asked teasing her a bit.

"Oh, fuck off Emily!", she huffed.

"Okay, okay I need your help…"

"So first you're making fun of me and now you want my advice? 3 words: not going to happen."

"Actually 4 words…"

" Oh sorry Miss Fitch, fucking smart ass", she muttered.

"Just lie down, I'm going to make you some tea", with this I threw a blanket over her and went into the kitchen.

Contently humming to myself I put on the kettle. _What I'm happy? _

When I was back in the living room I heard muffled snores indicating Katie was already asleep. I bent down, stroked a strand of hair out of her face and decided it was bedtime for me too. I had told Naomi we'd have dinner on Friday, so I had plenty of time left to think about the perfect place to go to.

**XXX**

_Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. What am I going to wear?_ I had precisely planned everything out, I had found the perfect place, I had prepared anything we'll need and told Naomi I'd pick her up at 9. What I hadn't thought of was my fucking outfit; I was standing wrapped in a towel in front of my wardrobe and nearly freaking out. I know it's what girls say constantly but I had really nothing to wear. The contents of half of my closet laid already scattered out on my bed and there were only just hoodies and old Pyjamas left. Surrendering I slumped down on top of the pile of clothes and covered my eyes with my hand.

"Maybe I should just go naked", I mumbled to myself.

"Yeah right I'm sure Blondie would quite enjoy that." Katie's voice startled me somewhat; I hadn't heard her coming in.

"Haha, just help me" Raising her eyebrows she folded her arms and looked expectantly at me.

"Please." She just turned her back on me and went out.

"Thanks, bitch. Don't bother this is just one of the most important evenings of my life", I shouted after her sarcastically. Only a few minutes later she returned, threw something at me and said: „You really don't deserve it but here you are."

I sat up and realised that it was a short black dress and some ridiculously high heels, it certainly would look good together.

"Thanks Katie, sorry for being so bicthy."

"Yeah, yeah kick your lazy arse into gear or you'll be late. Wouldn't want your princess to be waiting." Oh shit, she was right it was already a quarter to 9. Now I properly freaked out, throwing on the dress in high speed I sprinted to the bathroom applying some makeup and adjusting my hair so I looked at least presentable. My plan to be irresistible definitely just failed.

**XXX**

Trying to calm my nerves I took a deep breath and slowly released it into the cold night air; small, white clouds escaping my mouth. _It's now or never._

_Now. Definitely._

I knocked and started smoothing out the non-existent wrinkles on Katie's dress. It fitted perfectly and I really was grateful, I had to buy her a nice perfume or something in return. The door opened immediately pulling my thoughts away from my sister ant to the beautiful girl now standing in front of me with a shy smile on her lips. I raked my eyes down her body: She was wearing black skinny jeans and a long blue top clinging to her in all the right places.

"You look gorgeous!", I blurted out and instantly averted my eyes to the ground.

"Well looking at you I really feel fucking underdressed", she said and I could swear I heard the awe in her voice. She was just too cute.

"No need to, believe me." Our gazes met and I was once again drowning in icy blue waves, which somehow managed to look warm despite their colour. _She's beautiful._

"Hi", our eyes still locked she broke the silence the timid smile reappearing.

"Hi", I breathed back. "Ready for our date_?" Oh fuck had I just said date? Why couldn't I shut my fucking gob for once?_

"Date, huh?" Her smile changed into a cheeky grin and she raised her brows slightly.

"I….uhm….well….I thought…" I was so embarrassed I couldn't even form a coherent sentence anymore.

"As ready as I can possibly be for a date with you", she said taking my hand in hers and pulling me towards the street.

**And that's it…for now. Next stop: their date! I promise there'll be some much deserved sexy time :P**


	14. Chapter 14

**Huh, I had really some difficulties writing this, I don't know why but it took me ages and I'm not quite satisfied if I'm honest. I hope it's not too shitty and you can enjoy it nonetheless **

**Thanks for your lovely reviews without them I honestly think I wouldn't have written this ;)**

**One thing before you read on: I've wanted to do this a long time but I keep forgetting …not so this time :D Please go and read Crazy2592's Shadows of the Night, it's a great story and hasn't nearly enough reviews ;D**

**Chapter 14: Naomi's POV**

Searching for Emily's moped I let my eyes wander but to no avail. Maybe we'd take the bus or I was just blind. At the moment I couldn't be bothered though, I had the most perfect woman I had ever laid eyes on walking beside me, holding my hand. To say I was happy would be the fucking understatement of the year, I wasn't even sure if there was a fitting adjective to describe my feelings. Emily squeezed my hand tightly and tugged slightly pulling me forwards, obviously I had been so lost in my head I had stopped. She smiled brightly at me and just like every time she did I felt a warmth surge through my body settling in my stomach and couldn't help but smile myself. – No, there was most definitely no word for this.

"Sooo where are we going?" She had refused to tell me our destination; although I had tried to make her spill it several times Emily had just smirked mysteriously at me and shaken her head no.

"You have to wait and see I suppose", cheeky grin fix in place she came to a hold in front of a black car.

"Oh come on Em, you said you would tell me today", I whined with the maturity of a 5 year old but I had never been one for surprises. My mum had stopped trying to hide my Christmas or birthday presents from me because I would always find them sooner or later. I just couldn't handle the uncertainty.

"I said you'd find out today, doesn't mean I'll tell you"

I sighed which brought a silent chuckle out of Emily. "Come on now, get in!"

She opened the car door for me and walked around to take a seat herself. "I didn't know you had a car too?"

"Oh I haven't this is Katie's" Emily started the engine and we drove off.

"But I like your moped." I pouted playfully at her.

Sniggering she answered:" Yeah me too but we need a car for my plan." She winked and brought her gaze back to the road.

"And what plan would that be?"

"Nice try Naoms." I stuck my tongue out, making her laugh in return. I loved her throaty laugh and hadn't realised just how much I had missed it until now.

**XXX**

After driving for a good hour all I could see was fields every once a while a tree but the last house we had come across was about 15 minutes ago.

"Hah I know what you're planning!", I shouted out in victory bumping my fist in the air. Emily's grip on the steering wheel tightened noticeable, her knuckles almost turning white. She looked slightly disappointed at me. "You do?" Suddenly I had a rather cruel idea to get back at her for keeping schtum.

"Yeah you're trying to kidnap me and murder me in the woods so you can burry my body and no one will ever know", I replied lowering my voice several octaves and desperately trying to keep a straight face. Biting her lip she frowned seemingly gauging my seriousness. _Oh my god she looks sooo cute! Don't laugh Naomi, don't laugh!_

In an attempt to seem anxiously I widened my eyes in shock and tucked my bottom lip between my teeth.

"No, of course not don't be silly Naoms." Ah she didn't quite believe me…yet.

"Please Em, I'm sorry I should have forgiven you earlier…I…please just let me go." I made sure my voice trembled and looked remorseful at her. Emily pulled to the side and stopped the car. Taking hold of my hands with one of hers she cupped my cheek with the other.

"I'm sorry Naomi I didn't want to scare you. I would never ever do anything to hurt you. I'll tell you, we…" And that was when I couldn't hold it back anymore, bursting out laughing I said:" Oh my god Em you should have seen your face!" Realisation dawned on her and she hit my shoulder, hard. "Oi bitch! You had me thinking you were afraid of me!" Trying to calm down a bit I stuttered out: "I-I-well you wouldn't tell me where we're going. Payback's a bitch". Still laughing I threw my head back and held my already hurting stomach. She continued to glare at me, but joined in after a few moments.

Now only just giggling Emily wiped her eyes, we had laughed so hard that tears sprung to both our eyes.

"This is nice", I said the seriousness now back. Smiling at me Emily took my hand in hers and intertwined our fingers.

"It is." I squeezed gently and brought it up to my mouth planting ghostly kisses on her knuckles. Our gazes locked then, she leaned in slightly closing her eyes in the process. I wanted to kiss her I really did, quite badly if I was honest, but something was bugging me so I released her hand, riveted on the street and said:" I hope we won't be late now for whatever you have in mind." Emily got the hint and retreated immediately a flash of hurt washing over her features. It tucked on my heart, almost painfully, but I couldn't… not yet anyway. Getting back her composure she looked away and started the engine again. _Way to ruin the moment Naomi._ There was an almost tangible tension in the air, which I wanted to resolve but didn't really know how. I hadn't wanted to hurt her or to make things awkward between us, but she still had some explaining to do…

The rest of the ride was spent in an uncomfortable silence and I couldn't believe I had ruined our date before it had even begun. Now that she was finally ready to give me a chance, to give us a chance. I had worked so hard to reach this point and now that she wanted me I had to spoil it. _Great Naomi, just great._

**XXX**

"We're here", Emily stated unbuckling her seatbelt. Before she could get out of the car I grabbed her wrist to turn her back.

"I'm sorry Em, I didn't want to upset you earlier, I..I just –Why did you kiss her?" Sighing deeply she stared through the windscreen. Still without looking at me she began:" I just couldn't handle it…my last relationship ended 2 years ago, it was rather painful…she was fucking Katie's friend behind my back…and I decided I wouldn't jump in something like that again, then I met you and I really liked you right from the start. It was the first time since 2 years that I felt something for another person and I really wanted it to work out. I wanted to do it properly, getting to know you, a few dates taking it slow you know. I was just so happy I had finally found someone I was interested in and it seemed like you liked me back. When I found out you were my student it was like a punch in the face for me, 'cause…I couldn't let it happen, I mean I shouldn't it is entirely inappropriate. So I thought maybe we could be just friends, but you kept flirting with me and I couldn't resist…" She took a deep breath, closed her eyes and exhaled slowly, her eyes still fixed straight ahead. Quietly I waited I didn't want to push her, but I needed to know. A few minutes passed and I reached out a hand resting it on her thigh. Giving it a gentle squeeze I reassured her to go on. Emily put one of her hands on top of mine; starting to play with my fingers she spoke up again:" When we kissed, you know we were watching "The Notebook" and you were just so sweet…The next day I freaked out completely, I felt like I had no control over my action anymore. So I ran away from you, from this whole fucked up situation and found myself at Effy's. She is my best friend always was since we were kids. She tried to calm me, tried to tell me I should just let myself be, but I couldn't. I stayed the weekend there, figuring out what I would do. I had too much time to myself, my thoughts were running in circles and at some point I had the crazy idea to make you leave me alone. I knew I hadn't enough strength to stay away from you so…so..I asked her to do it, to kiss me in front of you. She told me it was mad but I wouldn't listen…. When I got home I found your rose and realised just what big of a mistake it was. I'm so so sorry Naoms. I-I don't know what to say anymore, I can only apologize and hope it is enough for you to forgive me." Turning her head she looked at me, for the first time since she had started her story, it was pleading, insecure, self-conscious. Overwhelmed by her little speech all I could do was stare at her, drawing everything in: her cute little button nose, her perfect cherry lips, her smooth, pale skin and her big brown eyes which reflected so much warmth, adoration and sorrow at once, I got lost in them again. I didn't know how much time passed it could have been hours but also only minutes until Emily finally broke the silence.

"Naoms?", she asked sheepishly while intently studying her hands.

That seemed to break the spell and I flung forward enveloping her in a tight hug. At first she stiffened a bit, but I reckoned it was only because I had surprised her with the embrace. It wasn't long until she relaxed into my grip and reciprocated. Burying her nose in my neck she breathed a sigh of relief and strangely I felt relief myself. I only just now realised that there had been an underlying tension between us, a tension that was thankfully gone now.

After a few moments I released her, but not without pressing a chaste kiss to her forehead. Emily smiled and boy it felt so good to finally have this intimacy with her back.

"Shall we go then?", I asked, suddenly remembering why we were here in the first place.

"Well actually we don't have any time left to...", Emily trailed of with a quick glance at her watch. She started the engine again which confused me somewhat. _Are we driving back home now? But what about our date? I want my date! _Trying to shut up my inner voice I shot her a questioning look, but Emily just laughed and concentrated on the road again.

**XXX**

"What are we doing here Em? We're in the middle of nowhere."

"Well I thought you already knew my glorious plan, so why do you have to ask?" She smiled cheekily at me. I huffed in fake annoyance and leaned back against my seat.

"Oi stop pouting you! You'll find out soon enough." I gave her a small smile but immediately resumed pouting.

"You look ridiculous Naoms!", Emily managed to get out between giggles. This only spurred me on and I folded my arms, shoving my bottom lip out even more.

"Oh my god I feel like I'm dating a child" I was sure she wasn't serious when she had said it but as soon as she realised what it meant and how "true" it was Emily stopped laughing, a stern look taking over her face. _Oh fuck! Say something you idiot, you can't allow her to get stuck in her head again!_

"A sweet child?" _Not something reminding her you are a fucking child in her eyes! Oh bloody hell, you're incapable Naomi!_

But it seemed to do the trick nonetheless and the frown was replaced with a smirk.

"Yeah a very sweet, but unnerving child. So let's make a deal: If you stop pouting and trying to get me to tell you where we're going you'll get a lolly."

"Cheeky! And yeah I'd like a lolly thanks." Sticking my tongue out I winked at her.

"A lolly it is then. We're here anyway!", she informed me enthusiastically and I turned around to survey my surroundings. There were hundreds of cars all parked facing the front where a huge screen was placed. _Oh my god is this a…_

"It's a drive-in cinema… But if you don't like it…"

"Em"

"…we could you know go somewhere else…"

"EM!"

"What?"

"I love it, I always wanted to watch a drive-in film since I had seen it in this movie…wow I can't believe it, this is perfect!" Although an enormous grin took over her face she blushed slightly, making her look all the more adorable.

"Really?"

"Really. Thanks Em" I kissed her cheek softly marvelling in the feeling of her soft skin against my lips_. Ah heaven!_

"So what are we watching?"

"You don't seriously think I'm gonna tell you, do you?"

"AAAH Em you are so annoying!"

"You love it." If only she knew how right she was, I did love her…I mean it.

**I know, I know I promised some sexy time, but I think it was important to sort everything out first…so you'll have to wait till the next chapter…sorry**


	15. Chapter 15

**So, I know it took me a while, but it seems all my teachers decided that the weeks before Christmas would be the best time to have tests – a shitload of tests. But hey it's over now, I had the last one today! :D**

**Other than this I have been a bit busy with one of my friends recently…she finally told me she fell in love with another girl and believe me there was a lot of talking to do. First I was a bit surprised as she's not one for relationships – or feelings in general – but then again I have suspected this for a while now. I didn't want to push her and just decided to wait till she comes to me. And now that she has, everything is a lot easier. I told her that it was perfectly normal and I'd always be there for her…hope that was the right thing to do. So this chapter is for her :)**

**Enough of my rants now, back to the story: Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews this, it really makes me smile every time I have a new review ;)**

Chapter 15: Emily's POV

"Oh my god, Pride and Prejudice, really? How did you get them to show this?" Her eyes were gleaming and she was practically beaming at me, yep right decision.

"You like it then?"

"Like? I love it! It's just perfect, you are perfect" Naomi looked at me, a soft expression taking over her face. I loved this, when I could read all her emotions in her beautiful blue eyes, when she let me see her, the real her not that cold snappy façade everyone else had to deal with. I smiled the biggest fucking smile I could muster and brushed my lips softly against hers. "I'm glad you like it" I said, our mouths still only inches apart; the movie long forgotten. "Mmmhmmm", she murmured before kissing me gently. _Oh my fucking god, that feels so good! How could I forget how good it feels? _It was slow, loving but somehow passionate nonetheless, it felt like she tried to tell me that now everything was resolved, that she had forgiven me – this made it the best kiss we had ever shared. A rather loud noise coming from Naomi's stomach interrupted us. "Hungry, are we?" I asked pulling away. She blushed, her cheeks an adorable shade of pink now Naomi nodded slowly. "Weeell originally I wanted us to have dinner before coming here, but then we got talking and there wasn't enough time left…I'm sorry. We could just leave and…" "No, no, no, no, no we're staying end of discussion." "But you're hungry!", I reasoned. "Yeah I am but I'm not going to starve Emily, just relax a bit." She smirked, shaking her head in the process. "Okay, okay we'll stay but somewhere…" I trailed off as I started to rummage around in the car. "Em, what are you doing?" I didn't reply straight away just kept on searching; opening the glove compartment I finally found what I was looking for. "Ah I knew it! Diet, pfff as if!". Grinning happily I retrieved some sweets and jiggled them in front of her eyes. Naomi just raised an eyebrow at me. "Dinner!", I concluded not believing that I had to spell out the obvious. She burst out laughing at that. "Hey what's so funny?" Naomi tried to answer through her giggles but failed miserably. "Well if you don't want it…", I said pouting slightly while I opened a package of m&m's to pop one into my mouth. Calming down enough to actually talk again she snatched the pack out of my hands. "And you're supposed to be the adult in this relationship." The car went quiet; I could literally feel the tension coming back settling between us like a huge invisible wall separating me from her. "Relationship?", I croaked out, impatiently waiting for her reply. Naomi averted her eyes, gazing at her hands which were tapping a steady rhythm onto her thigh. I didn't want to push her so I decided to just wait till she was ready to elaborate, but when the silence stretched out and became unbearable it seemed like she needed a little push into the right direction. I reached out to her and pulled her chin up to make her look at me again. "Hey Naoms, look at me", I added when she kept her gaze on her hands. Brown met blue and upon seeing the look in that ocean pools all coherent thoughts were wiped from my mind. _Oh, I could spend a whole day just staring in her eyes… _"Yeah relationship." Her voice was so low I wasn't even sure if she had actually said anything. _Nah, you're probably just imagining things._

"I mean I'd like to you know be your girlfriend, only if you want to of course but I just – I can't stand the thought of you being with somebody else. When I saw you with Effy it was like fucking hell – and I – I want you to be mine." _AHHHHHHHHHHH OM MY GOD, did she actually just say this? Naomi Campbell wants to be my girlfriend? Wants me, Emily Fitch? YES, YES, YES! _I started chanting in my mind, if I was alone I'd do a little happy dance right now – I was ecstatic.

"Emily?", she sounded uncertain, vulnerable, hesitant. _Fuck say something you twat, she probably thinks you don't want her! _"YES!", I shouted out. I felt my cheeks starting to burn, embarrassed by my sudden outburst, but Naomi didn't seem to care she just slung her arms around my neck and squeezed me tight.

"Really? Are you sure?", she whispered in my ear. I pulled away a little bit, just so I could look at her properly. "I have never been this sure about anything in my entire life", I told her and hoped she would pick up on the sincerity this statement held. A huge smile broke across her face and she leaned forward in our embrace kissing my nose, my cheeks, my forehead, my eyes and finally pecking my mouth softly. My face tingled where her lips had been moments before and I felt this already familiar warmth in the pit of my stomach, which always seemed to surge through me when Naomi was around._ This Emily is what heaven must feel like! _

**XXX**

After Naomi's confession we had decided to actually watch the film for a change, snuggling of course. I couldn't keep the smile off my face for the whole evening and I seriously doubted it would disappear anytime soon – I was happy. And guess what it felt just fucking wonderful, like I was flying or floating, everything seemed suddenly brighter, better (yeah I know this sounds like the sappy shit we all know from romantic movies, but hey what can I say it's true).

We were now driving home, well I was driving her home…although I really should be paying attention to the road I couldn't help but glance at her every once in a while; she was just a breathtakingly beautiful girl – **my** breathtakingly beautiful girl. My smile grew 10 times bigger and I wondered when it would reach the point it would actually start hurting.

"What are you smiling about?", Naomi asked smirking at me. _Yeah, like you don't know._

"Well I hate to tell you but I met an amazing girl and at the beginning it was a bit complicated but she just asked me to be her girlfriend…and I said yes", I replied grinning.

"I see...guess you're taken then huh?", she plays along.

"Absolutely am."

"In this case we probably should stop seeing each other. I doubt that your girlfriend would be too happy about it."

"Ah she'll be fine with it. We have an open relationship."

"Oi, don't you dare!" We both start laughing uncontrollably; with this the last bit of remaining tension dissipated.

**XXX**

"I guess I should go in then", Naomi stated, not moving though.

"Yeah" Still neither of us turned around. We were standing in front of her house for at least 15 minutes now, talking, laughing and generally just don't wanting to say goodbye. After everything I had put us through we were finally happy together, I was afraid if I left her all of this would turn out to be a dream and I would wake up alone in my bed again. She seemed to be fighting the same fear and I wished I could just ask her to stay at mine tonight, but was afraid she would think it was too early for something like this. And even if she agreed what would she tell her mum? I sighed audibly, instantly making her frown.

"Everything okay Em?" I cupped her cheek gently with my hand and began to stroke my thumb over her face.

"Yeah, I just don't want to leave." Her frown immediately changed into a soft smile, covering my hand with one of hers she said:" I don't want you to leave either." I took a step closer; standing on my tip-toes I placed a delicate kiss on her lips.

"Good night Naomi, I'll call you okay?"

Looking at me, adoration evident in her features, she nodded: "Night Em, sweet dreams." She turned around and disappeared behind the door. Walking to Katie's car I decided that now was the perfect time for my little happy dance.


	16. Chapter 16

**Soo I know it has been a while now, but I was just really busy with all this Christmas stuff….hope you can forgive me ;) Thanks for your encouraging reviews, they really brighten my days :) Hope you all have a happy new year!**

Chapter 16: Naomi's POV

_I. Am. Emily's. girlfriend. Aaaaaaaaaaah oh my god! Could life get any better?_

Smiling I leaned my back against the front door, closing my eyes as soon as I could feel the hard wood connecting with my skin. I was happy, truly happy. I couldn't remember the last time I felt so relieved, giddy and simply carefree – Well, there's a first time for everything. I sighed, my eyes still closed I let the contentment wash over me, causing a pleasant warmth to spread all over my body.

"Why are you grinning like a lunatic?"

_Yeah it was too good to be true….._

"It's just a wonderful day, don't you think?"

"What are you on? And can I have some?", my mum smiled at me a playful glint in her eyes.

"Noppp!", I answered popping the p.

Taking my coat off I sauntered into the kitchen to settle down on my favourite chair.

"Aaah! Tea?"

"Wooooah, whatever you took love, feel free to do it on a daily basis."

"Funny mother", I rolled my eyes, placed my phone on the table and leaned back.

A few minutes passed while my mum made us tea and told me practically glowing about her new "love". Usually it would annoy the fuck out of me but today I just couldn't bother so I endured her babbling, but never once stopped to smile. I didn't even notice when my mobile beeped, instead I was relieving every little moment of my date with Emily until…

"Oh my god you accepted my advice then huh? Your old mother is good for something at last." She grinned broadly at me.

"What?", I asked completely confused.

"Emily.", she stated sounding exasperated. Just in that instant I noticed that she had my phone in her hands and was already typing away.

"Heey! Never heard about privacy?" I sprang to my feet and snatched the device out of her grip.

**Hey naoms, I had a lovely time tonight :) I'm already missing you, wish you could be here with me ;) XX**

"So somebody had a date tonight and it wasn't me.", she winked at me.

"Yeah I was on a date with Emily and it was great, happy now?"

"Not yet. When am I going to meet this fascinating creature who managed to make my daughter all loved up?" That brought me back to reality; she couldn't meet Emily, at least not now.

"Never? I don't need you to embarrass me, mum"

"Ooh come on I wouldn't, promise. I just want to get to know her a bit, pleeeeeease."

"Mum you're being ridiculous and still no."

"But it is my parental duty to check you're not hanging around the wrong people."

"You were never interested in the people I hang out with!"

"Well, I am now, so tell her to come over for dinner. Tomorrow would be perfect!" she beamed, anticipation written all over her face. I pondered on this for a second, it would just be one dinner and she'd never know who Emily really was, I surely wouldn't tell her and Emily neither, she was never going to these parent's evenings anyway. So why not? She would stop to annoy me and I would have my peace back. I sighed dramatically.

"Will you shut up if I ask her?"

"YESSS!", she shouted out clapping her hands.

**XXX**

"Hey you"

"Hey yourself", I could hear her smiling.

"Not sleeping yet?"

"Nah, daydreaming about my amazing girlfriend."

"You have to introduce her to me one day." Now I was the one smiling.

"I will, maybe, but for now I want her all to myself."

"Is that so? Well, you won't like my question then."

"Why? What question?"

"My mum wants to meet you, she invited you over for dinner tomorrow."

Silence.

"Emily? You still there?"

"What? Yea, yes I'm here….I …It's just I don't think that's a good idea Naoms. We agreed to keep it quiet, I know it isn't perfect and believe me if I could I would scream from the top of my lungs that Naomi Campbell is my girlfriend….But it just isn't possible. Not now."

I sighed, my mood dropping a bit instantly.

"Yeah I know. She read your text and just kept going on about how she'd like to meet you, get to know you and that shit."

"What have you told her about me?" Alarmed.

"Nothing, nothing important for that matter, just that you're great, I really, really like you and we were out today. That's it, I promise I'd never do something to jeopardise your job Em."

"I know, I know…It's just so fucked up, 'cause I'd quite like to meet her too to be honest."

"You do?" Surprised.

"Yeah, I mean she's your mum after all and that makes her an important person in your life…" She trailed off.

"You could just come you know, we simply won't tell her who you really are, she doesn't have to know."

"I don't like the idea of lying to your mum, it just doesn't seem right, besides it's just too risky. Don't you think?"

I was quiet for a few moments.

"Yeah, you're probably right, sorry."

Her tone immediately softened: "Hey, you don't have to apologize, it was nice of you to ask me and under other circumstances I'd have said yes without a second thought. "

A small smile graced my lips, but I decided to change the subject.

"So are you free tomorrow? I'd like to see you nonetheless."

"Yeah, 'course. What do you have in mind?"

"Wait and see", I responded smirking.

"Oh come on tell me!"

"No, not even thinking about it."

"AAARGH; would you at least tell me what to wear Miss Campbell?"

"I suppose that'd be okay. Mmmmh dress casual, but bring a jumper."

"A jumper? So we're going somewhere outside…mmmh maybe…"

"I won't tell you don't even try."

"You are so annoying!"

"That's not very nice, not knowing where we're going, is it?" I smiled smugly.

"Ha ha, veeery funny Naoms."

"Yeah, what can I say I'm a natural."

"Mmmh and modest too, you're definitely a keeper."

We both burst out laughing and couldn't speak until it subsided in quiet giggles.

There was some rustling at the other end of the line which ended in Emily shouting something.

"I have to go now, Katie's home, apparently another bad date." She sniggered.

Then I there was a faint:" I heard that, bitch."

"She sounds nice."

"Yeah wait till you meet her."

"Was that a threat?"

Emily giggled again.

"I really have to hang up now."

"Okay, I'll text you tomorrow about the details. Goodnight Em."

"Goodnight baby, have sweet dreams." And the line went dead. My heart started thumping almost painfully against my ribcage upon hearing her call me baby. I smiled, what seemed like for the thousandth time for tonight and added in my head:

_Yeah definitely will…dreams about you._


	17. Chapter 17

**Forgive me? I'm so sorry for not updating sooner, but I really had a lot to deal with the last couple of weeks (a family member died after fighting 7 years against cancer…it was really horrible, but I'm glad he doesn't have to be in pain anymore.)**

**If you're still willing to read this let me know and I'll try to update regularly again otherwise I'll take it down because I've a lot on my mind at the moment and if nobody is interested in the story anymore I don't want to waste my time.**

**Thanks to those who keep reviewing, I really need something to brighten my days…**

**Chapter 17: Emily's POV**

The light breeze blew her shining blond hair out of her face; she looked at me with those hauntingly beautiful blue eyes of hers. I smiled I couldn't help myself I was so happy to just be with her. Suddenly her features changed and a cheeky smirk took over…oh no she wasn't going to…before I had enough time to brace myself for what I knew was coming she had already pushed me into the water. And oh my fucking god it was so cold it was almost painful. I yelped and resurfaced rubbing my eyes before I opened them just to see her standing on the shore and laughing uncontrollably at me.

"Wait till I get you, bitch!", I shouted and began running out of the water, towards her. My wet clothes clung to my skin; they were so heavy I felt like I weighed 1000 tons. She screamed and started to run away from me, ah not so quick. I took after her now laughing too, she slipped and nearly fell over. Ha, this was my chance I grabbed her waist and lifted her. Glad dad made us work out like crazy when we were teenagers. I grinned as I saw her surprised expression – Didn't think I was strong enough huh? She slung her legs around my hips, leaning in until I could feel her hot breath on my ear: "That was incredibly sexy", she murmured her voice deep like a purr. My body instantly responded in the way I was already used to: Goose bumps erupting all over and wobbly knees… Oh fuck I was tempted to kiss her and so I did, or well I pretended I was going to, but when our lips nearly touched I ran into the ice-cold waves and bent down so we were now both under water. Ha didn't expect this? We both resurfaced her legs still tightly wrapped around me.

"You bitch!", she shouted but I saw the playful glint in her eyes, she was only kidding.

"Payback's a bitch honey", I responded grinning.

"Oh I'm so going to wipe that smile off your face!"

"Really? And how do you plan to achieve this?" I asked raising an eyebrow.

"How about this?" She leaned in and our lips finally met in a passionate kiss…

*beep* *beep*

"Fuck no!" I cracked my eyes open unbelievingly pissed off. Whoever it was that decided to end my perfect dream was about to get a bollocking. I snatched my phone from the nightstand and opened the text I had received:

**Morning beautiful **

**Be ready at 9, I'm gonna pick you up and don't forget the jumper XX**

My mood immediately lifted, I smiled goofily and reread the lines Naomi had sent me. Well, I suppose I could forgive her…

**Morning yourself **

**I'll be ready and waiting for you XX**

Quickly I hopped out of bed and into the shower instead, can't have me stink now can we?

**XXX**

9 o'clock and Naomi, punctually like always, was already knocking on my door. _Shit, shit shit, like Naomi is always on time I'm always fucking late…great Emily now go greet her in your underwear you twat!_

"Just one sec!", I shouted and wrapped a towel around my still quite wet body. I took a deep breath and opened the door looking slightly sheepish.

"Hey"

"Hey Emi…woah…I..hey", she stuttered upon noticing my current state of dressing, a blush quickly creeping up in her cheeks making her look all the more adorable.

"I'm sorry Naoms, I know I'm a bit late would you mind waiting till I'm finished?", I asked letting her in. After getting no answer for several moments I looked her in the eyes and realized hers were drawn to my naked legs and started wandering upwards.

_Ooooh she is so perving on me!_

"Naomi?", I said a little louder effectively snapping her out of it.

"Yeah, what…did you say something?"

"Well actually I wanted to know if you'd mind waiting till I'm ready, only when you're done perving of course." I smirked knowingly at her watching as she turned almost the same colour as my hair. _Was just too good to let it go._

"I was not perving!", she insisted once she had found her words again.

"'course you weren't.", I answered sarcastically; "Do you want a tea or anything?"

"Erm no it's okay just go and put something on", Naomi stated still watching me.

"So it's bothering you, isn't it? Just admit you were perving and I'll be dressed in less than 5 minutes." _Oh yes, I like teasing her. No, not like that, perv!_

She huffed out a breath in fake annoyance and mumbled:" Who wouldn't…"

If possible my grin just grew twice its size. I walked over to where she had sat down and kissed her cheek softly, gracing the very corner of her mouth.

"Hi", I whispered my lips still lingering close to her cheek.

"Hey" I kissed her cheek again just because I could and left the room without another word.

_This day's gonna be amazing!_

**XXX**

It was extraordinary warm, the sun was shining down through the window of Katie's car (Yea I somehow managed to convince her to let me borrow it again, don't ask me how)as we were on our way to well wherever we drove. Naomi still hadn't told me she just sat on the passenger seat and called out the directions like a living GPS system. I chuckled silently at that, which of course she noticed.

"What are you laughing about Miss Fitch?"

"Oh nothing, you just remembered me a bit of a navigation system is all." I couldn't hold back another laugh.

"Haha very funny as usual, just drive or I might decide to rather spend my day alone", she bantered.

"Nah you wouldn't do that, you missed me."

"Urgh you are so annoying sometimes, you know that don't you?"

"You love it Naoms."

"Yeah, yeah I do", she rolled her eyes in this Naomi like manner and I had to restrain myself from stopping the car and kissing her breathless, she was just so sexy.

_NO Emily, baaaaaad! Ah shut up brain! _

"Left"

"What?"

"Left Em, left, left, left…ah now you missed it"

"Sorry I got a bit distracted by a certain blonde…" A smile took over Naomi's features, but I just couldn't hold it back. "Yeah did you see her, damn hot if you ask me."

"Bitch!" Now I was the one smiling. It was so easy to just be with her, talk to her, laugh with her, banter with her I couldn't quite believe it. I felt like I had known her for ages, but at the same time it was exciting like something entirely new. God she really was the only person, who could make me feel this way, she was special and I could smack myself in the head for not realizing this any sooner.


	18. Chapter 18

**Hey guys, thanks for all your lovely reviews and the condolences, I'm sure it will get less painful eventually. In the meantime it really made me smile to see so many people are still interested in this, so I'll try to continue…This one is really, really, really short but I thought you deserve something **

"It's beautiful, really…", it seemed like Emily was at a loss for words. We stood side by side looking at the enchanting landscape unfolding in front of us. I smiled a little; yeah it was the right decision to bring her here. Although this place was mine, special, and I had never brought anybody here before, because well I just wanted to keep it to myself really, to share it with Emily was okay. She was just as special as this place. It felt right, like everything with her.

_Oh my god and I sound like a crappy romantic movie again. Urghh._

"Naoms?", Emily waving her hand in front of my face, trying to get my attention broke my reverie.

"Yeah sorry I spaced out a bit there…", slightly embarrassed I started rubbing my foot on the ground.

"Yeah I could tell! So what are we gonna do now we're here?", she asked with a cute little grin.

It was then I remembered the basket and the blankets I had brought with us.

"Ahhhm I thought we could hmn just have a little picnic…", I trailed off maybe she didn't like the idea.

…_and you fucking idiot don't have a plan B, typical really._

Emily turned to look at me and took a few steps towards me. Smiling she reached for both my hands and entwined our fingers, my heart sped up as a reaction to her touch.

"That's a really nice idea Naoms" Our gazes met, something in her chocolate pools captivating me I couldn't avert my eyes; so I just stared at her. To be perfectly honest staring at Emily, observing her, taking her in, everything about her was something I would happily do for hours (or maybe even longer). She simply fascinated me. At a point during our staring contest something switched, the atmosphere changed completely and all I could now see in her eyes was want and desire. I was sure there was a resembling look in mine, because she leaned in and placed her lips firmly on mine. This time it wasn't slow or tentative like the few kisses we had already shared, instead it was frenzied and full of lust. Emily began tracing my bottom lip with her tongue to ask for entry, which I gladly granted. The moment our tongues met didn't feel like an explosion or a firework, it simply was like coming home. In my kiss induced daze I took a step further and started nibbling on the creamy skin of her neck. Fuck me she tasted fabulous, I never wanted to stop. Localising her pulse point I sucked on it, hard, which made her moan in response. That was going to leave a mark, for sure. While I was trailing a hot line of kisses to her collarbones and back up to her mouth she pushed her hands underneath my shirt and caressed my back. In a rarely boost of confidence I moved my right hand up her torso, stopping at her breast. After a short moment of hesitation I began palming it softly. Letting out a deep growl Emily pulled away from my moth, her breathing ragged.

"Oh god Naoms…"

Taking this as a good sign I wanted to resume kissing her, but she pushed me away.

_Oh shit, maybe this was too much, maybe I did something wrong? Fuck I'm just too inexperienced!_

"Naomi we have to stop. Now!"

The feelings now invading my chest were completely different to the ones before: Disappointment, uncertainty and hurt. Avoiding looking at her I stepped away running my hands through my hair in the process.

"Sorry, I thought you liked that", I mumbled, my eyes fixed on the grass I was standing on.

_I hope I didn't mess it up!_


	19. Author's note

**Hey, sorry if you thought this was an update but I just wanted to say that I won't be able to update for at least 2 weeks, because I'm going to Ireland! **

**I'm really, really sorry but I promise I'll write a new chapter as soon as I can ;)**

**To all of you who are from Ireland or have been there before: Anything in particular I should do/visit?**

**Love PP**


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